2019 Movies
OSCARS Won/Nominated
3 From HellDir: Rob Zombie Stars: Sherri Moon Zombie, Bill Moseley, Richard Brake What a huge disappointment! I have been waiting for this trilogy conclusion for months and it turns out...it just shouldn't have been made. House of a Thousand Corpses was a fun spookfest. The Devil's Rejects is one of the greatest exploitation horror films ever made that actually seems to delve into the psyches of psychopaths. 3 From Hell is fan service with characters we love just acting evil, with no rhyme or reason, and with no direction whatsoever. Sherri Moon is so unhinged that I couldn't wait for her to be offscreen. Moseley has no purpose whatsoever other than look crazy and spout crazy philosophy. It is sad that the late Sid Haig only had one scene as Captain Spaulding due to health issues, but Richard Brake is a welcome addition. I wanted so much from this film. I knew it wouldn't live up to Rejects...but it doesn't even come close to Corpses. C- |
6 UndergroundDir: Michael Bay Stars: Ryan Reynolds, Melanie Laurent, Corey Hawkins If Michael Bay is making an action movie with Ryan Reynolds...then I am on board. But...you come to something like 6 Underground because of Ryan Reynolds...and you want him to be Ryan Reynolds-y. Strangely...he seems super stoic and almost bored with these proceedings. The next part of the pedigree is Michael Bay...and this is DEFINITELY a Michael Bay movie. It has some spectacular action set pieces, especially the opening scene. But like almost every Michael Bay movie..it gets to be so much that your brain becomes over-saturated and numb. C+ |
1917Dir: Sam Mendes Stars: George McKay, Dean-Charles Chapman, Colin Firth, Mark Strong, Benedict Cumberbatch Some may feel that 1917's one-shot gimmick is just that, a gimmick. I find it an astonishingly effective way to tell a war story. The story is simple...two Brit soldiers are tasked with getting their asses many miles away to warn a battalion to not attack or they will be slaughtered. What follows is a terrifyingly intimate adventure of these two trying to move as quickly and safely through war-torn France...with varying success. My heart was in my throat the entire time...and the one-shot device made it all the more realistic. Unlike any war film I have ever seen A- |
Abducted in Plain SightDir: Skye Borgman The subject of this documentary is absolutely mindboggling. It tells the story about the Broberg family and how they welcomed their neighbor Robert "B" Berchtold into their house...only to effectively GIVE their daughter to him. Sure...it wasn't exactly that...but this family is so naive, so full of rubes, that they didn't recognize that this man was a pedophile...even after he kidnapped their daughter and disappeared for over a month. The things the Brobergs do throughout this horrible saga is so absurd it lacks credulity. However, even with all that, it isn't a very well MADE documentary. Neither is here much historical footage or cinematic flair. This is a talking head documentary through-and-through. It is a good thing that the story is so astonishing that it gets by. B |
Ad AstraDir: James Gray Stars: Brad Pitt, Tommy Lee Jones, Ruth Negga, Donald Sutherland I thought I was going to be in for a hell of a ride after an astonishingly effective opening scene involving a disaster in space where Brad Pitt falls to Earth. What followed looked great, sounded great, and I appreciated Pitt's reserved, stoic performance. However, James Gray's journey through the solar system slows to a crawl to the level of almost boredom. The time jumps felt weird, the "problem" out at Neptune is never really explained, and the entire package left me bewildered and confused. Gravity this is not. It is not even Interstellar. B- |
Alita: Battle AngelDir: Robert Rodriguez Stars: Rosa Salazar, Christoph Waltz, Jennifer Connolly, Mahershala Ali, Jackie Ealre Haley, Ed Skrein It looks as though Robert Rodriguez is back to form. This film was long in production by James Cameron, and it shows. Alita: Battle Angel comes across as a combination of AI: Artificial Intelligence, Elysium, and Rollerball. That may seem like a lot...and it is...but for the most part, I was exhilarated by this film. The special effects are about 95% spectacular, and 5% wonky. The story is sweet and exciting. And then there are the action sequences....that really elevated the film for me. The Motorball sequences are totally tacked on for visual spectacle. I'd normally be miffed at that, but damn if it wasn't outstandingly entertaining. B+ Digital |
AladdinDir: Guy Ritchie Stars: Will Smith, Mena Massoud, Naomi Scott Aladdin had everything going against it. Robin Williams' Genie is one of the most beloved Disney characters of all time. Guy Ritchie is not known for his family-friendly fare and has has some disastrous movies as of late. Also, besides Will Smith, the film is full of unrecognizable faces. However, flying in the face of all that, the film is a delight! Will Smith definitely makes the Genie his own, playing him like a magical Hitch instead of a new generation of Williams. The race-appropriate cast was risky but it works perfectly. Massoud is good as Aladdin but Naomi Scott SHINES as Jasmine. Actually...my only complaint is the handling of Jafar. Jafar is one of Disney's greatest villains, oozing with gravitas. This Jafar, as played by Marwan Kanzari, is a petulant child and is the films only major weak spot. B+ Digital |
All That We DestroyDir: Chelsea Stardust Stars: Samantha Mathis, Frank Whaley All that We Destroy has my favorite premise to date of all of the Into the Dark movies. A famous geneticist has a son that is a violent serial killer. She uses her proprietary technology to keep cloning a woman to try and get her son to overcome his killer tendencies...and she keeps failing. It is a little Dexter from the mother/son's POV, and a little Groundhog Day from the clone's. But it never quite escalates to "good". The violence is not scary...it is disappointingly matter-of-fact. It provides a clever yet bland film. C |
Always AmazingDir: Steve Byrne Stars: The Amazing Jonathan I have a longtime affection for The Amazing Jonathyan and his act. I obsessively watched his specials, my parents got him to sign his book for me, and I went to see him live in Vegas with my wife and her family. He has the kind of manic, outrageous, sick comedy that is RIGHT up my alley. This short documentary gives us a glimpse behind the curtain, and it IS wonderful to see how legends like Penn Jillette and David Copperfield. However, there is NOT enough information here. They talk about a dire prognosis of his.....ok...and? The young kid that idolized him and grew up to be his tour manager? It started out a LITTLE Finding Neverland-ish, and then just moved on. His wife? Ex-wife? New girlfriend? There was so much more to be told and the movie just felt like it was a mad-dash to the credits. B- |
Always Be My MaybeDir: Nahnatchka Khan Stars: Randall Park, Ali Wong This film is written by Randall Park and Ali Wong, and they are two hysterical people. Also, they have FANTASTIC on-screen chemistry as well. The populated their film with terrific supporting characters (especially James Saito) and one of the best self-deprecating cameos in years. This all equates to Always Be My Maybe being one of the most wonderful romantic comedies I have seen in a long time. Sure, the tropes are there and there is some manufactured drama...but there is a wit and heart to this film that you so rarely see. I just loved it beginning to end...and its cornball ending really got to me. I was a bit misty. B+ |
The Amazing Jonathan DocumentaryDir: Benjamin Berman This SHOULD be called The Amazing Jonathan Documentary Documentary because this is a meta-documentary of the highest order. Its tells the story of how Benjamin Berman attempts to make a documentary about the dying Amazing Jonathan, only to find out that Jonathan has hired a second, or even a third, or even a fourth documentary crew to follow him around. Throughout the film, you start getting a severe Andy Kaufman vibe...and if it turned out to be AJ just fucking with everyone...I would have LOVED it. The vagaries at which it ended was frustrating. This film project deserved so much more. B |
Angel Has FallenDir: Ric Roman Waugh Stars: Gerard Butler, Morgan Freeman, Danny Huston, Nick Nolte, Piper Perabo Mike Banning has been a fun character to follow. Olympus Has Fallen was great fun, and London Has Fallen had its moments. This third entry into the series about the Secret Service agent sees him framed for an assassination attempt...because...of course it does. The story is standard Fugitive affair, but if you like this series, you will dig this third film. It is still R-rated, a lot of things go boom, but one further thing must be mentioned. Nick Nolte is so absurdly good that he seems plucked from a different film. He is by far the best part of the film. B |
At the Heart of GoldDir: Erin Lee Car Erin Lee Carr does it again. This woman is am AMAZING documentarian. Mommy: Dead and Dearest, I Love You, Now Die, and now this. With multiple layers of intrigue, this film tells the story of how Larry Nasser, the doctor to the USA Women's Gymnastic Team, was able to graphically and continually sexually assault dozens upon dozens of girls across decades. You will find it impossible to pick your jaw up off the floor throughout the film. And you will find it impossible not to sob in sorrow during the finale filled with Victim Impact Statements. A- |
Avengers: EndgameDir: The Russo Brothers Stars: Literally Everyone Well, The Russo Brothers, Marvel, and Kevin Feige have done it. A decade of films, none in my opinion, worse than a B-, billions of dollars, and unprecedented inter-connectivity, Avengers: Endgame has arrived and it is everything I wanted/needed it to be. I has a hair's breadth away from a A+, because over the course of 181 minutes, I was laughing, crying, and having an incredible experience. Over the course of 22 films, I have become quite invested in all of these characters' stories. Well... i wouldn't change a single second! A Digital |
Between Two Ferns: The Movie
Dir: Scott Aukerman Stars: Zach Galafianakis Between Two Ferns is an incredibly niche skit on Funny or Die where Zach Galafianakis interviews celebrities in obnoxious, insulting, and rude ways. It CAN be funny...but it hinges on how much you like ZG. He has an assholish aura, and BTF is him at his most asshole-y. Well...NO ONE wanted a movie about this scenario...and for good reason. There is NO reason for this movie to exist. Sure...set up a scenario for ZG to cross the country and interview celebs...who cares. When the 100% best thing about your movie is the outtakes...there is a serious problem. I hated this movie. D- |
Black Christmas
Dir: Sophia Takal Stars: Imogen Poots, Cary Elwes There was a Black Christmas remake back in 2006 with Michele Trachtenberg. it was god-awful. In 2019, they remade it again with Imogen Poots (whom I love)...and it is still god-awful. They TRIED to inject a bit more plot and theme into this 2019 one. In 2006, a slasher returned to his childhood home now populated with sorority sisters, during Christmas. This time, sorority sisters are being stalked by what seems to be some sort of cult, duringChristmas. It is still dumb, not scary, and the womens' power message is so on-the-nose that it takes away from said message completely. D |
Brightburn
Dir: David Yarovesky Stars: Elizabeth Banks I really like the idea of this movie. Imagine the Superman origin story, of a kid who crash lands to Earth only to grow-up possessing unimaginable powers. No imagine that kid is evil. Pretty simple right? Well...Brightburn feels pretty incomplete. It is as if this film is Episode 1 and Episode 8 of a decent Netflix series. It is that small and that rushed. It was a shame because there could have been some emotional depth if it was a series or properly paced. C+ |
Captain Marvel
Dir: Anna Boden & Ryan Fleck Stars: Brie Larson, Samuel L. Jackson, Ben Mendelsohn, Annette Bening, Jude Law Oh how disappointing and formulaic Captain Marvel is. Yes, it's B- is still decent, because Marvel Studios just knows what it is doing now, but this film just feels like everything we have seen before. Brie Larson is wonderful however, bringing as much charisma to her role as anyone in the MCU. But this origin story about a Kree warrior, where she came from, how she got powers, and her fight against the Skrulls offers almost nothing new other than a female badass who will seemingly be the key to defeating Thanos. No Marvel film is great unless the villain is great, and this movie fails at that, (minor spoiler) even though Ben Mendelsohn is a lot of fun. When it was over, I realized this was pretty much the love-child of The Bourne Identity and Guardians of the Galaxy, but nowhere near as good as either. B- Bluray |
Child's Play
Dir: Lars Klevberg Stars: Aubrey Plaza, Tim Matheson I dreaded seeing this movie...but it is a silly horror flick so my wife insisted. Well...it is not as bad as you would think. The idea that Chucky is now, basically, a Google Home Android run amok is a clever idea. However, it is a double edged sword. While making a change from serial killer-possessed toy to robot, Child's Play may seem a bit more grounded...but the life and emotion is sucked right out of the film. There is definitely something to be said about Brad Dourif voice acting his butt off to an absurd extreme over Mark Hamills emotionless, dry delivery. C |
Countdown
Dir: Justin Dec Stars: Elizabeth Lail Sure it is dumb...a story about an app, that once installed, shows you how long you have to live. But Countdown flirted with pulling off some Final Destination-level fun. It doesn't...but I give it credit for trying. First...PG13 horror movies are almost NEVER as good as they could have been as an R. Second...I really thought there was going to be some cleverness peeking through the fog. It didn't get there. This is not a disaster. C |
Crawl
Dir: Alexandre Aja Stars: Kaya Scodelario, Barry Pepper Creature Features are rarely GOOD cinema, but they CAN be fun. Crawl is just stupid. Too much "I'm not leaving...this is my home" nonsense. Too much convenience of the heroine being a swimmer. And too simple...stuck in flooding Florida house with gators. I was excited when the first gator arrives and gives you a great jump-scare...and then it got old real quick. D |
The Dead Don't Die
Dir: Jim Jarmusch Stars: Bill Murray, Adam Driver, Chloe Sevigny, Tilda Swinton When a filmmaker's reputation precedes them, you get a mess of a movie like The Dead Don't Die. Jim Jarmusch is a respected director, but he has no business making a zombie horror-comedy. It is so obvious that his heart is not in it, and it is even moreso obvious that Bill Murray doesn't want to be there. It is more odd than funny. It isn't scary. And the Meta stuff is clever but out of left field. Even after all tyhat complaining, I do give it a C+. The film is just so strange and unusual, it was kind of fascinating to watch...even if it mostly did not work C+ |
Doctor Sleep
Dir: Mike Flanagan Stars: Ewan MacGregor, Rebecca Ferguson Mike Flanagan is quickly becoming a MASTER of modern horror. I didn't have HUGE expectations for Doctor Sleep. However, after the masterpiece that is The Haunting of Hill House, I was excited. This sequel to The Shining, story wise, has incredibly lofty aspirations...adding vampiric beings that seem to be out of left field. However, Flanagan, MacGregor, and Ferguson are more than up to the task...and they somehow keep the tension ratcheted up for the entire 2.5 hr run-time. It isn't until the climax that the film gives us some fan lip-service...but it is worth the wait...and is about as good as it can be. B+ |
Dragged Across Concrete
Dir: S. Craig Zahler Stars: Mel Gibson, Vince Vaughn, Tory Kittles Zahler is quite the unique voice...but he may suffer from a bit of overindulgences. The only thing really WRONG with Bone Tomahawk was its length and molasses-level pacing. The same thing is the problem with this film, whereby a couple of suspended cops are out to rip-off some robbers and take their haul for themselves. it is that simple...and it takes over 2.5 hours to tell it...and that's the problem. In a way...it IS brave to show Vince Vaughn eat an egg-salad sandwich for 3 minutes to exemplify the annoyance Mel Gibson has for him. But, on the other hand, it really tests one's patience. The acting is top notch and Zahler is a superb director. He needs to become a good editor as well. B- |
Drunk Parents
Dir: Fred Wolf Stars: Alec Baldwin, Salma Hayek, Jim Gaffigan I didn't mind the premise and the cast...but the final product is just such an all-over-the-place mess. The lead pair get drunk one night, while trying to sell all their furniture on their front lawn (they are broke). Apparently they rented their neighbor's house (that they are housesitting) to a pedophile. And then they swap houses. And then THEY are kidnapped and beaten as the pedophiles. Then the neighbor's furniture is stolen. Then they recover it and live in the furniture truck. WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON??? Baldwin has the comic chops to get some laughs through...but Hayek does NOT. What a disaster. D |
El Camino
Dir: Vince Gilligan Stars: Aaron Paul, Jesse Plemons Did we really need a Breaking Bad movie? Not really? It was one of the greatest shows of all time with an incredibly satisfying finale. Still...letting us know what happened to Jesse Plinkman was pretty fun. It isn't much more than a glorified episode of BB, but it would have been considered a better one. Aaron Paul carries the film well enough, and Plemons is always a delight, and there is enough moments of fan-service...but it really is ultimately unnecessary. Gilligan is so talented...I would love to see him focus his efforts on his next venture and not just the Breaking Bad universe. B |
Escape Room
Dir: Adam Robitel Stars: Taylor Russell, Logan Miller, Tyler Labine, Deborah Ann Woll I guess a PG-13 horror movie based around the Escape Room fad was inevitable. Fine. The film is about a group of strangers sent to an Escape Room actually designed to kill them has some clever moments and designs, but it can't stay afloat because of its APALLING writing. Why must there always be an unmitigated asshole in these movies...where their sole purpose is to be asshole-y. All of your lives are in danger and the more brains working on a puzzle the better. Also, the REASON? Please! A movie like this better be as brilliantly vague as Cube or astonishingly clever as The Cabin in the Woods. C+ |
Extremely Wicked, Shockingly Evil,
and Vile Dir: Joe Berlinger Stars: Zac Efron, Lily Collins, John Malkovich, Jim Parsons Efron & Collins's superb acting aside, Director Joe Berlinger may not have been the man to make this movie. He directed the superb documentary mini-series The Ted Bundy Tapes, so he is well-versed in the material. However, a lot of the film either assumes you know all of the backstory about Ted Bundy or the venture comes across as a re-enactment of his mini-series instead of a proper narrative. Still, as the film progresses, it gets more and more into its own groove, until the final act where is shines. The two leads act their hearts out and they really do well...they just needed a bit more talkent behind the camera to make the film rise to the next level. B |
The Fanatic
Dir: Fred Durst Stars: John Travolta, Devon Sawa The Fanatic is an exceptionally strange film. Only a star like Travolta, whose career had reached such heights to only find itself in such lows, would even attempt a role and a film so outrageous. Honestly, Travolta is going full Simple Jack in this role where is a crazed fan obsessed with a huge action star. Travolta's Moose obviously has learning disabilities, emotional problems, and a host of other issues...and most of Travolta's acting is over-the-top at best and downright offensive at worst. Having said all that...I found myself terrified at a lot of points in this movie. I never knew what was going to happen with the loose-cannon, unhinged Moose. So even though my eyes hurt from rolling so much...I HAVE to give the film credit for being successful in the part where it counts. B- |
Fighting With My Family
Dir: Stephen Merchant Stars: Florence Pugh, Nick Frost, Lena Heady, Jack Lowden, Vince Vaughn, Dwayne Johnson, What an absolutely, surprising pleasure. Like the Disney Sports films of old, Fighting With my Family tells the story of WWE star Paige, and her journey from local British daughter of a wrestling family to her debut on Monday Night Raw. Florence Pugh is a vision as Paige, playing her to absolute perfection. The supporting players also approach the material with such earnest that even when the goofy Nick Frost is proud of his daughter , you CAN'T hold back tears. It is 100% predictable cliche...but it is more refreshing that you could believe. Disliking this film is nearlly impossible. B+ |
OSCARS
Best Picture
Best Editing Best Sound Editing Best Sound Mixing |
Ford v Ferrari
Dir: James Mangold Stars: Matt Damon, Christian Bale, Jon Bernthal, Josh Lucas Out of all of the Oscar movies this year, Ford v Ferrari is the most "Hollywood" among them. Directed by a veteran, starring two of our biggest movie stars, expensive, flashy, and wonderfully crafted, this film is solid entertainment. It does have its flaws though. Few people will care about how Ferrari was winning the Le Mans race in the '60s and Ford needed a re-branding...so that is a HUGE hurdle. Also...surprisingly...Damon is pretty wooden and uninteresting in the film. However, Christian Bale once again shows us how he is one of our VERY best actors in Hollywood and the racing scenes are perfectly realized. B+ |
Freaks
Dir: Zach Lipovsky & Adam B. Stein Stars: Emile Hirsch, Bruce Dern, Amanda Crew I dug this movie. I can't explain what franchise I would compare it to as it would spoil things, but I wish said franchise has the balls to make a movie like this. It follows a young girl who is kept boarded up in her house by her paranoid father. He is constantly teaching her a story about how to lie about who she is. There is an ice cream truck outside with Bruce Dern...and we are not quite sure what his deal is. It is a slow, mysterious burn...and when things get revealed...it is a lot of fun. Good performances, well plotted story, and decent enough effects. Not too shabby. B |
Frozen II
Dir: Chris Buck & Jennifer Lee Stars: Emile Hirsch, Bruce Dern, Amanda Crew This is film is better than its predecessor...but I just can't get through the emotional barrier these movies have toward me. They feel so oddly engineered for toys, so much more so than any other Disney films, and it yanks any emotional depth right out of the story. The animation is incredible, to the point that I think Walt Disney Animation is starting to overtake Pixar in impressive visual style. The music is great, as expected. But how many times can Anna complain to Elsa about the fact that they promised to never keep anything from each other or leave each other? And then it happens, of course. I was rolling my eyes when I should have been in awe. B |
Fyre
Dir: Chris Smith Early 2019 saw two documentaries exhibiting a disastrous con job of a music festival, called Fyre Fest. A young Entrepreneur named Billy MacFarland is quite a character (and fellow Bucknell alumnus by the way!). Honestly, he had a few good ideas early in his career. The exclusive credit card was cool and millenials like exclusivity. Then he teamed up with Ja Rule to create an app called Fyre, where people can book blockbuster talent for private events. To promote the app, they thought up Fyre Fest. Fyre is the polished Netflix documentary that gives you all the crazy facts about how MacFarland was WAY in over his head. B |
Fyre Fraud
Dir: Jenner Furst & Julia Willoughby Nason The Hulu documentary, Fye Fraud, is a little more haphazard and amateur as a documentary of about Billy MacFarland's Fyre Fest failure. However, not being produced by the advertising company behind the fest, Fuck Jerry, it is more scathing and critical. So, in general, both docs are solid. Fyre is the documentary for documentary lovers. Fyre Fest is more true-crime, tabloid stuff. Both good. B |
Gemini Man
Dir: Ang Lee Stars: Will Smith, Mary Elizabeth Winstead, Clove Owen I don't really know what happened with this movie. Ang Lee directing Will Smith in an action film seems like a can't miss. But this story about an aging assassin coming face to face with a younger version of himself is as big an Ang Lee misfire as his Hulk almost 20 years ago. Sure, with Lee and Smith, the action can often be breathtaking. However, the clone effects just do NOT work and I was so bored by its mediocrity that I though I was missing something. C+ |
Glass
Dir: M. Night Shyamalan Stars: James McAvoy, Samuel L. Jackson, Bruce Willis, Sarah Paulson Recently, I re-watched 2000's Unbreakable in preparation for Glass. It is just as terrible and excruciating as I remember. However, I loved Split so much that I was excited for the end of the surprise trilogy. Well...Glass is not great. Everything that involves James McAvoy though, is fantastic. The "Horde" is infinitely more interesting, well-acted, and mysterious in comparison to David Dunn and Mr. Glass. In fact, Jackson and Willis are terrible and pointless in this film. Whenever the film focused on them, I checked out. I really think M. Night Shyamalan is an ambling, unfocused filmmaker. Sometimes he can strike gold, but usually he has misfired. Glass feels forced, with stakes that are far too low, and Shyamalan can't write his way out of a wet paper bag. Still, if you were a fan of Split, this film is worth it if only for McAvoy's continuation of his tour-de-force acting chops. B- |
Godzilla: King of the Monsters
Dir: Michael Dougherty Stars: Kyle Chandler, Vera Farmiga, Millie Bobby Brown, Ken Watanabe, Zhang Ziyi, Sally Hawkings, David Strathairn I am actually a fan of 2014's Godzilla. Sure, the titular beast wasn't on screen much, but the human story shared between Bryan Cranston and Aaron-Taylor Johnson was decent enough to become invested in the story. NOT so with it's sequel. The humans and the plot devices are so incredibly stupid in this movie...no one would mind if every single one of them were just crushed under Godzilla's foot. That being said...the cinematography and special effects are superb and the movie just looks great. The beast vs. beast stuff is adrenaline charged and fun. But then, every so often, those idiot humans show up with their "Look what we have done to this planet" garbage and ruin everything. C+ |
Hail, Satan?
Dir: Penny Lane This is an interesting, if subtle and slightly unfocused documentary about the Satanic Temple. They are a group that isn't what is sounds like. Founded by Lucien Grieves, they are a group of mostly atheists who use the Satanic iconography to point out instances of church/state separation problems. Arkansas wants the Ten Commandments erected on state property? The Satanic Temple is fine with that, as long as they can erect a 9 foot statue of Satan as well. See? Those instances of pointing out hypocrisy is where this film shines. Where is lags is when the film seems to focus on the provocative nature of the temple. Of COURSE they are provocative. That is the point. But it is what that provocation achieves is the real interest here...and there isn't enough of it. B- |
Happy Death Day 2U
Dir: Christopher Landon Stars: Jessica Rothe Happy Death Day was fine. It was a horror genre Groundhog Day ripoff that was perfectly serviceable. It was hugely successful so here is the inevitable sequel. It is amazing, but this thing is kind of brilliant in its zaniness and Jessica Rothe is going to be a star. The first film's plot was straightforward...Tree had to find out who was killing her to stop the loop. This time, the film goes full on batshit crazy, flips the genre to almost comedy, and it works even better. The reliving the day trope is still there, but now we are dealing with different dimensions and multiverses and one of the most ridiculous MacGuffins of all time. Jessica Rothe is a vision though. He is hysterically funny in her frustrations, believable in her horror, and surprisingly poignant in the dramatic scenes. So much so that it actually makes the tone of the movie all over the place, and that is my biggest gripe. B |
Hellboy
Dir: Neill Marshall Stars: David Harbour, Ian McShane, Milla Jovovich I think the vitriol this movie has garnered is not really that fair. It's not a very good movie, it pales in comparison to Guillermo del Toro's films, there are FAR too many subplots going on, and there is obviously MAJOR studio interference going on here. Neil Marshall is too good a filmmaker for this to be entirely his fault. But...there ARE some positives with this film. David Harbour is an excellent choice to be the titular character. Also...it definitely earns it's R-rating. Some of the guts and gore are delightfully over-the-top. It looks good, sounds good, and there is some fun to be had. However...it IS a mess. C+ |
Hobbs & Shaw
Dir: David Leitch Voices: Dwayne Johnson, Jason Statham, Idris Elba, Vanessa Kirby It took 8 movies for me to finally get on board with the Fast and the Furious franchise. The 8th film was extraordinarily silly but fun. Hobbs & Shaw spins off those titular characters into their own absurd save-the-world movie. It is equally silly, but not nearly as fun. This is just dumb action a la a Transformers movie. It is ever-escalating mayhem with comedy that never lands. Still...it is fun to watch Jason Statham fight...much more so than Johnson. I hate to admit it though, the camaraderie of the Fast cast goes a long way to it's enjoyment. As corny as their whole "Family" through-line kind of works. There is none of that here. Why do these two even hate each other at this point? I thought they settled their differences last time? Why am I thinking so hard about this nonsense? C- |
Holiday in the Wild
Dir: Ernie Barbarash Stars: Kristen Davis, Rob Lowe Holiday in the Wild surprised me. It is not a great movie...but there is enough heart and believability woven into the story that I sort of bought it. David is a retired vet whose husband breaks up with her on the eve of an African safari...so she goes alone. Hijinks ensue and she is brought under the wing of Rob Lowe's Elephant conservationist and the rescue station. There is a lot of corniness throughout, but one can definitely understand falling in love this way, with a person, with a cause, and with an environment. C |
The Hustle
Dir: Chris Addison Stars: Anne Hathaway, Rebel Wilson I really hated this movie. It had the exact same problem with Rebel Wilson as Melissa McCarthy's movies directed by her husband does. Simply because Rebel Wilson is the producer, no one had the balls to tell her that she wasn't funny. She is so over the top, stupid, and cartoonish that it takes about 5 minutes until you can't stand the sight of her. Same goers with Hathaway. What bet did she lose to wind up in this garbage? D- |
Hustlers
Dir: Lorene Scafaria Stars: Constance Wu, Jennifer Lopez, Julia Stiles, This film just didn't work. It seems to pride itself as some sort of girl-power movie, but I felt it was just exploitative nonsense. For what seemed like an eternity, the opening is an ongoing spectacle of "look how hot these women are" and "look how sleazy men are while enjoying them". Then we dive into the plot, which is such a straight line (drug men, steal their money, avoid capture) without any nuance, twists, or even reasons to root for the protagonists (or are they antagonists?), that I didn't care. The performances are good and Scafaria has a lot of visual flair, but it never really amounts to much. C |
I Am Mother
Dir: Grant Sputore Stars: Clara Rugaard, Hilary Swank, Rose Byrne This is a neat little minimalist Sci-Fi thriller of which Netflix is famous for at this point. They love getting A-listers and telling sci-fi, limited narrative stories. I am Mother is a story about a young woman who was born in a bunker after an apocalyptic event and cared for by an AI robot her entire life. She lives her entire believing she is the only human alive...until Hilary Swank shows up. It looks great and is well-directed...and props to Rose Byrne as the voice of mother. It doesn't QUITE stick the landing...but it is a pretty fun ride. B |
I Love You, Now Die
Dir: Erin Lee Carr This documentary messed with my head in a way few documentaries can. Most people know the story of Michelle Carter. The press made her notorious for being a callous girl who forced her boyfriend to commit suicide through text messages. Well...it is not nearly as simple as that. Director Erin Lee Carr, of Mommie Dead and Dearest fame, perfectly splits the documentary into 2 parts, the prosecution and the defense, and you will go on a roller-coaster ride of emotion and opinion in ways you will not expect. B+ |
In the Tall Grass
Dir: Vincenzo Natali Stars: Patrick Wilson Vincenzo Natali is no stranger to minimalist horror. His Cube is still a cult classic and the entire film is shot on a single set. Well, he is back at it with In the Tall Grass, where is horror setting is not much more than a field of grass. It involves a brother and sister who enter a field because of a distant child yelling for help. Then they become trapped inside, where geography and time have no semblance. However. Natali just handles it well and the scares really come through. There is one moment that caused my wife to scream so loud, that I thought the neighbors would call the cops. It is THAT good. B+ |
The Intruder
Dir: Deon Taylor Stars: Michael Ealy, Meagan Goode, Dennis Quaid I love me some Dennis Quaid, and he is actually a pretty menacing presence in this film, but I really hate it when these thrillers have characters that do not act in ANY way that a real human would. Any real person, after paying a previous homeowner $3.5 Million dollars, and awaking to find them mowing their lawn, would freak out. They would tell them off, warn them, and immediately call the police if he tried that crap again. Not these idiots. They invite the guy to Thanksgiving. REALLY? How can you be scared for people who don't even RESEMBLE real people? D |
Kevin's Pick
Best Documentary
|
The Inventor:
Out for Blood in Silicon Valley Dir: Alex Gibney The best documentaries have three things: Subject, Style, and Access. The Inventor is chock full of all three and it is riveting. It tells the story of Elizabeth Holmes, a Stanford dropout who founded her company Theranos, to be able to perform 250 blood tests with a single drop of blood. The company was worth $10 Billion, had people like Henry Kissinger on the board, and the world was touting her as the next Steve Jobs. The problem was that she was full of shit! This doc chronicles her rise and fall. It may not include some of the juiciest details about her personally (romantic life, that odd voice), but the company's culture is interesting enough. I loved it! A- |
Io
Dir: Jonathan Helpert Stars: Margaret Qualley, Anthony Mackie, Danny Huston I often attempt these Netflix science fiction films because sometimes they are clever and enjoyable. Good Lord...that is not the case with Io. What a disastrous movie...if you can even call it a movie. The premise is the Earth has essentially been destroyed and everyone has traveled via spaceship to Jupiter's moon, Io. Then there are people left on Earth, whose atmosphere is poisoned, who believe that the Earth will heal itself. So there is a young woman and Anthony Mackie, and they are arguing about taking the last ship to Io for 90 minutes. It is so pointless and uninteresting that I was flabbergasted. Margaret Qualley is also a pretty awful actress, so you can't get invested in her story, or buy her character arc at ALL. What garbage. It is stuff like this that dissuades me to go down the Netflix rabbit-hole to find unique stuff. D- |
OSCARS
Best Picture
Best Director Best Supporting Actor Best Supporting Actor Best Adapted Screenplay Best Editing Best Cinematography Best Production Design Best Costume Design Best Visual Effects |
The Irishman
Dir: Martin Scorsese Stars: Robert DeNiro, Joe Pesci, Al Pacino Yes, The Irishman is really long at 3hrs and 29min. But not once throughout that gargantuan run time was I bored. Far from it. I actually wouldn't have cared if this story went on an on. I had an ominous realization however whilst watching this film. I am not sure that these legends of Scorsese, DeNiro, Pesci, and Pacino have any movies this dramatic, this complex, and this mature left in their arsenal. Everyone is firing on all cyclinders. The three actors have not been this good in probably two decades...and they all elevate eachothers performances. Sure, there are some wonky bits of the de-aging process (they still move like 70-year-old men evn if they are supposed to be 40 in the scene), but isn't too distracting. This is patented Scorsese...and I don't think he could have been more satisfied by what he has created. B+ |
Isn't it Romantic
Dir: Todd Strauss-Schulson Voices: Rebel Wilson, Adam Devine, Liam Hemsworth, Priyanka Chopra This movie is funnier and more charming than it has any right to be. It reminded me of the fantastic spoof of romantic comedies, They Came Together, except this time there is a character in it conscious of its absurdity. It also has a bit of Enchanted flavor. Rebel Wilson has never quite done it for me, but she is wonderful here as a hopeless woman knocked in the head and awake in a romantic comedy utopia. No one is as surprised as me that I laughed continually throughout the film. B |
It: Chapter Two
Dir: Andy Muschietti Stars: James McAvoy, Jessica Chastain, Bill Hader, Bill Skarsgaard I didn't QUITE buy into the first It film, but I buy into the sequel even less. I still love Skarsgaard's realization of Pennywise, but taking the mythology and transporting it two decades to where the kids are now adults...sucks a LOT of the danger and excitement out of the franchise. In the first film, I felt the kids were over-written, but their vulnerability went a long way. Here...I have no idea what the internal logic is, how anyone expects to defeat Pennywise, and why we should care for these people. I was pretty divested this time around. And good God was it too long. C+ |
Jack of All Trades
Dir: Harvey Glazer & Stuart Stone I went in to this documentary because it was quick and somewhat interesting. The premise of the film is that a guy has a BUNCH of baseball cards at his mother's house...leftover from the heyday when his estranged father was a heavy hitter in the industry. He wants to bring these valuable collections to card shows and make a killing. However, he finds out that they are pretty much worthless. Fun enough right? But you have NO idea the left turn this movie takes. It is not a quirky documentary about an esoteric subject. Just you wait until you see how serious a family docudrama it becomes! B+ |
Jay & Silent Bob Reboot
Dir: Kevin Smith Stars: Kevin Smith, Jason Mewes, Everyone Else Come on Kevin Smith...you are so much better than this! Almost 20 years after Jay & Silent Bob headed to Hollywood to stop a movie being made about them...Kevin Smith has gone back to the exact same well to send them back to prevent the reboot. However...it is a disaster. Smith & Mewes were comically too old to do this schtick back in 2003. Now it is borderline sad. I think Smith is just too high to write his patented dialogue any more (just see Tusk and Yoga Hosers). Also...the nepotism of hiring his daughter is just a terrible decision, because she is just not a likeable screen presence. The only saving grace is the Ben Affleck/Joey Lauren Adams reunion. Promise me...it is the ONLY saving grace. D |
Jexi
Dir: John Lucas & Scott Moore Stars: Adam Devine Do you like Adam Devine? Not many people do. I do...and it is probably the only reason this film isn't a "D" or lower. it tells the story of a doofus who is obsessed with his phone, gets a new one, and the new one takes over his life (since everything is done over computers...get it). It is 100% predictable, unbelievable, and corny as hell. However, Devine has a certain charm that entertains me. So even though I can recognize that this is a mess of a movie...it gets KIND of a pass from me. C |
John Wick Chapter 3: Parabellum
Dir: Chad Stahelski Stars: Keanu Reeves, Halle Berry, Ian McShane, Laurence Fishburne, Asia Kate Dillon It has taken 3 films for me to buy into the John Wick phenomenon. It took 3 films of universe building, pedigree building, and budget building. Reeves' choreography feels more creative than the shoot, toss-over-shoulder, head-shot repetitiveness of the first two films. The absurdity where almost everyone in every city visited seems to be part of an assassins' brotherhood is more forgivable. In the end...I feel like John Wick has crossed that threshold just as the Fast and the Furious films have; it embraces its own audacity and doesn't try to be anything it is not. B+ |
OSCARS
Best Picture
Best Supporting Actress Best Adapted Screenplay Best Editing Best Production Design Best Costume Design Kevin's Pick
Best Supporting Actress
Best Adapted Screenplay |
JoJo Rabbit
Dir: Taika Waititi Stars: Roman Griffin Davis, Scarlett Johansson, Sam Rockwell, Taika Waititi What a magical, powerful film JoJo Rabbit is. I was unprepared as to how much of a gut punch the film was able to deliver when all of the marketing made it look like a Mel Brooksian farce. Sure...the lead child is a member of the Hitler youth and converses with his imaginary friend, Adolph Hitler...but it is so much more than that. It is the horrors of Nazi Europe as seen through the innocence of a 10-year-old boy...and that innocence, in such a society, can not last. I loved the film. I loved how it deftly balanced the laughs, all totally rational and earned, with the seriousness of what is happening around this playful, naive child. A- |
OSCARS
Best Picture
Best Director Best Actor Best Adapted Screenplay Best Editing Best Cinematography Best Costume Design Best Original Score Best Sound Editing Best Sound Mixing Kevin's Pick
Best Actor
|
Joker
Dir: Todd Phillips Stars: Joaquin Phoenix, Robert DeNiro, Frances Conroy, Zazie Beetz I tried so hard to not like this movie as much as I did. I wasn't excited about ANOTHER iteration of the famous DC villain. Why bother trying to top Heath Ledger? Well...Joaquin Phoenix may have just done that. My expectations for DC movies is in the gutter, with only Wonder Woman bringing any merit to the brand. I didn't know Todd Phillips had this movie in him. Joker is certainly a Scorsese love-letter, borrowing heavily from Taxi Driver & The King of Comedy. However...Phoenix's Arthur Fleck is a force of nature. It elevates this film to greatness in a way no perfance has done since Charlize Theron in Monster. I found myself terrified, disturbed, devastated, and completely and utterly invested. This will go down in history as Todd Phillip's, and possibly Joaquin Phoenix's, masterpiece. A Bluray |
OSCARS
Best Actress
Best Costume Design Kevin's Pick
Best Actress
|
Judy
Dir: Rupert Goold Stars: Renee Zellweger I only listed Renee Zellweger in the cast for a reason. Judy, the movie, is not very good. It is poorly paced, the peripheral characters and plot-points are wholly uninteresting, and there is hardly a story-arc to be had. However, Zellweger is nothing short of perfection in the titular role...and I would be amazed if she didn't cruise right to the Best Actress oscar. If you took this performance and Zellweger performed it on a darkened stage (no sets, costumes, or supporting roles), virtually nothing would change. Astonishing performance. Flawed film. B |
Jumanji: The Next Level
Dir: Jake Kasdan Stars: Dwayne Johnson, Kevin Hart, Jack Black, Karen Gillen, Awkwafina, Colin Hanks, Danny DeVito, Danny Glover I really dug the first Jumanji film. It was funny, exciting, and gloriously ridiculous. I was excited for the sequel, even though I expected more of the same. Well...they really found a way to make it fresh. it was a simple formula...just shuffle around/inject new personalities into the main 4 Jumanji characters. This time, Danny DeVito is in Dwayne Johnson (fun), Danny Glover is in Kevin Hart (hysterical), and Fridge is now in Jack Black. Black is still the films' MVP, and the video-game/anything goes spirit of the movie is still great. I hope they keep this series going. B+ Bluray |
OSCARS
Best Original Screenplay
|
Knives Out
Dir: Rian Johnson Stars: Daniel Craig, Ana De Armas, Christopher Plummer, Jamie Lee Curtis, Chris Evans, Don Johnson, Toni Colette, Lakeith Stanfield What a fantastic whodunit. With possibly the greatest cast performance in years, Knives Out is a wonderfully executed Agatha Christie-eqsue mystery. Daniel Craig is Benoit Blanc...Rian Johnson's Hercule Poirot...and his is an obnoxiously accented investigator out to find out who killed Harlan Thrombey. Beleiev it or not...this film is not much more than people talking about what they were doing and when they were doing it. Only for motives, POVs, truths, and lies to be revealed with perfect timing, perfect comedy, and it makes it all as exciting as an action movie. Straightforward...but superbly done. B+ |
Lady & the Tramp
Dir: Charlie Bean Voices: Tessa Thompson, Justin Theroux Dog-lovers will fall-in-love with this movie. It is a live-action remake of the beloved Disney animated classic, and it has a lot of charm. There is nothing really too new with the story, but the voice work is decent, the effects are as good as they need to be, and it is completely harmless. That's it...it is almost exactly what you would expect. B- |
Last Christmas
Dir: Paul Feig Voices: Emilia Clarke, Henry Golding, Michelle Yeoh, Emma Thompson If it weren't for the actors' charisma, this movie would have been a disaster. It is 100% predictable, corny, and the weird George Michael shoehorning is very distracting. But Clarke is adorably magnetic in her role. Yeoh and Thompson are a hoot to watch as well. Golding normally oozes charisma, but he oddly didn't work well. Still...this film about a girl with a messed up life meeting a seemingly perfect man, barely gets a pass. B- |
Leaving Neverland
Dir: Dan Reed Told in two, four-hour parts, Finding Neverland tells the story of Michael Jackson's abuses through the lens of two boys, Wade Robson & James Safechuck, who has relationships with Michael in the 90s. The film is pretty straightforward with talking heads and archival footage...but the outrageousness of the story makes it all riveting. Take all of the sexual abuse allegations out of the picture. What is left behind is still incredibly creepy, inappropriate insane activity from a man that should be institutionalized. They way MJ acted, what the parents were all so blind to, how families were destroyed through the hero worship...its astonishing. Then there is the sexual abuse...and it is very, very upsetting and infuriating. B+ |
Kevin's Pick
Best Animated Film
|
The Lego Movie 2: The Second Part
Dir: Mike Mitchell Voices: Chris Pratt, Elizabeth Banks, Will Arnett, Tiffany Haddish, Stephanie Beatriz A More than worthy sequel to the beloved The Lego Movie. This crisp, hilarious film picks up where the last film left off, with the baby sister's Lego monstrosities arriving to cause mayhem. Cut to 5 years later and the Lego community has become a Mad Max style city. Also, all the main characters have been whisked away by a spaceship and Emmet must save them. What follows is a hilarious adventure that is just full of eye candy, great humor, and a song that outdoes Everything is Awesome in catchiness. It is a BIT odd how the film kind of doubles down on the fact that this is all just part of the real-life kid's imagination (and literally acknowledges this point in hilarious fashion), but the film is still a riot. B+ |
The Lighthouse
Dir: Robert Eggers Stars: Robert Pattinson, Willem Dafoe What an astonishingly well-executed movie. It has a weird aspect ratio, it is in black and white, and the two stars are quite difficult to understand. But this story about two lighthouse keepers, butting heads, and succumbing to the pressure and insanity of being marooned on their small lighthouse island, is incredible. I felt the loneliness, the desperation, and even some of the camaraderie. As things devolve into a full-on nightmare scenario...my stomach was in knots and my jaw was agape. Amazing film! A- |
OSCARS
Best Visual Effects
|
The Lion King
Dir: Jon Favreau Voices: Donald Glover, Beyonce, James Earl Jones, John Oliver, Chiwetel Ejiofor, Billy Eichner Does Jon Favreau's gorgeous "live-action" recreation of the beloved 1994 animated film need to exist? No. Does it offer up much more than the original film? No. However, whether you are a lover of the original film or not, if your jaw is not agape from the moment "Circle of Life" begins until the film ends, from a technical standpoint...then you just don't love cinema. This is essentially another animated film...but it is so well rendered that you honestly believe that these are talking, cognizant animals. Nearly every musical number is a bit less than the original Disney magic...but this fresh new perspective is quite astonishing. B+ |
OSCARS
|
Little Women
Dir: Greta Gerwig Stars: Saorsie Ronan, Emma Watson, Florence Pugh, Laura Dern, Timothy Chalamet, Chris Cooper This film is kind of a delightful, enjoyable mess. The directing is great. The acting is superb (although Watson is left in the dust by her costars), and the production design is second to none. I have a problem with the writing in this film though. The first act felt DESPERATE to prove itself to the naysayers...with such rapid fire dialogue that is was incredibly distracting. The second act was phenomenal and if that was sustained...this could have been a masterpiece. I also disliked the way the meta ending wanted to have the whole film both ways...and it came across as a cowardly way to end it all. Still...there is a lot to love here. B |
Long Shot
Dir: Jonathan Levine Stars: Charlize Theron, Seth Rogen, O'Shea Jackson, Jr, Andy Serkis, Bob Odenkirk Theron plays the Secretary of State about to announce her Presidential candidacy. Rogen plays an idealist, leftist journalist. She used to babysit him. He had a crush on her. Now she has hired him as her speechwriter. With just that information, you know EXACTLY where this film is going...but Rogen and Theron are so charming together...you buy into it. It's really all that has to be said. These are talented and funny people...and they made a talented and funny comedy. It is that simple. B |
Ma
Dir: Tate Taylor Stars: Octavia Spencer, Juliette Lewis, Luke Evans Good God! I hated this movie. How could the director of The Help deliver such a stupid, disastrous thriller? I haven't the foggiest. Octavia Spencer is at her most Octavia Spencer-est as Ma, a woman who allows teenagers to get drunk in her basement. Does she have some alterior motive? Of course she does, or there wouldn't be a movie. I didn't buy a second of this movie. No one acts the way actual people would act...and not a second of the film is scary. The trailer made this look pretty cool...but as it is...it is an utter failure. D- |
The Man Who Killed Hitler and then the Bigfoot
Dir: Robert D. Krzykowski Voices: Sam Elliot this is a very strange movie. It feels like a madcap comedy without any laughs in it. The story is so absurd, whereby Sam Elliot is the man that pulled off what the title says, that it is almost impossible for it to be relatable. The one saving grace is Sam Elliot's performance. It is so good that it basically leaves the rest of the film in the dust. While his emotions and performance are punching us in the gut...we could not care less about all of this Hitler and Bigfoot nonsense. B- |
OSCARS
Best Picture
Best Actor Best Actress Best Supporting Actress Best Original Screenplay Best Original Score |
Marriage Story
Dir: Noah Baumbach Stars: Adam Driver, Scarlett Johansson, Laura Dern, Ray Liotta, Alan Alda The title is a misnomer...because this movie is about a divorce...not about a marriage...and it is exquisite. Noah Baunbach has formulated a PERFECTLY balanced film about a marriage disolving. Adam Driver is right and wrong. Scarlett Johansson is right and wrong. The frustration, sorrow, and desperation are absolutely heartbreaking. Even though Driver and ScarJo are delivering career best performances...the supporting performances really drive this film home. All these two souls want to do is get through their divorce and can only go by their lawyers' advice. It is amazing to see how an amicable divorce can become a battle with blood in the streets...all with the best intentions. A- |
Men in Black International
Dir: F. Gary Gray Stars: Tessa Thompson, Chris Hemsworth, Liam Neeson, Emma Thompson Should the MIB franchise continue? Probably not. The Will Smith/Tommy Lee Jones pairing was what made those films special. Sure, we all ate up the aliens, the music, and Barry Sonnenfeld's direction...but the film shined because of the stars. This rebranding isn't terrible, and Thompson's & Hemsworth's chemistry is well-carried-over from Thor Ragnarok, but Men in Black International is totally forgettable. For every funny quip or cool alien, you will remember a better one from the previous trilogy. I had a decent amount of fun...but I just didn't quite see the point B- |
Kevin's Pick
Best Picture
Best Original Screenplay |
Midsommar
Dir: Ari Aster Stars: Florence Pugh, Jack Reynor I think it is safe to say the Ari Aster is a wholly original voice who could possibly be the reincarnatiuon of Stanley Kubrick. Hereditary was great...but Midsommar REALLY ius something special. The film is patient, emotional, and incredibly terrifying. Lesser horror films tout themselves as being about relationships, or grief, or some other non-horror theme. Midsommar has the goods and is ACTUALLY about relationships and grief...all the while scaring the ever-loving hell out of you. Florence Pugh is magnificent and her character arc in this film is extreme, but totally earned. Best movie of 2019 so far bar none. A |
Midway
Dir: Roland Emmerich Voices: Ed Skrein, Patrick Wilson, Woody Harrelson, Luke Evans, Aaron Eckhart, Nick Jonas, Dennis Quaid Sure...Midway is total overblown nonsense. However...Emmerich shows once again...how amazing he is at the big budget destruction extravaganza. It really is that good...and it is solely responsible for this "B" rating. There are to huge problems with this film though. First...look at that cast! With the POSSIBLE exception of Patrick Wilson...all of these actors are acting in ways they would have in the 1950s. It all feels so hollow, staged, and ridiculous. Also...Ed Skrein might be the worst hero in modern memory. He has been a decent enough villain in Deadpool and Alita: Battle Angel...but his is so unlikable that he sucks the life RIGHT out of the dog fighting and patriotic chest-puffing. Honestly...I couldn't have cared left if he was shot down...and that is a HUGE problem for a World War II movie like this. B |
Murder Mystery
Dir: Kyle Newacheck Voices: Adam Sandler, Jennifer Aniston, Gemma Arterton, Luke Evans, Terrence Stamp I am an Adam Sandler Apologist. Most people would say his Netflix tenure has been terrible, but I disagree. I find a bit to grasp on to in each of his latest outings. However...this one is just terrible. His chemistry with Aniston is nonexistent...almost the opposite of chemistry...to the point that you find it hard to root for these people or even believe they are a couple. Do they even like each other? There are a FEW laughs, and I'll always enjoy the Gemma Arterton eye candy, but all Murder Mystery seems like is an excuse for a few starts to cruise the Mediterranean for a few weeks...not a movie. D |
Never Surrrender
Dir: Jack Bennet If you are a fan, as I am, of the whimsical sci-fi comedy, Galaxy Quest, then this documentary will be enjoyable. Sure...there is not much artistic merit to the documentary, as it looks as if it is simply an extra on a Bluray. However...they properly had access to all of the big-wigs involved with the film. Tim Allen, Sigourney Weaver, Sam Rockwell, Justin Long, Tony Shaloub...They are all here waxing poetic about their time on set. Most poignantly...how wonderful Alan Rickman was on set. There is nothing too special here...but it is always fun to hear these stories about films you love. B |
Noelle
Dir: Marc Lawrence Stars: Anna Kendrick, Bill Hader, Shirley McClaine, Billy Eichner Writer/Director Marc Lawrence is known for some of Hugh Grant's late 90s/Early 2000s fare...so you know his stuff is pretty corny. His new Disney+ movie is no different. Noelle tells the saccharine story of Santa's kids (Hader & Kendrick). When the time comes for Hader to take up the Santa mantle...he freaks out and runs away to Arizona. Kendrick has to go find him to save Christmas. It has some charm but is 100% predictable. The effects are pretty awful...but there are a few times when the movie tugs at the heartstrings effectively...so it keeps its head above water. B- |
OSCARS
Best Picture
Best Director Best Actor Best Supporting Actor Best Original Screenplay Best Cinematography Best Production Design Best Costume Design Best Sound Editing Best Sound Mixing |
Once Upon a Time in Hollywood
Dir: Quentin Tarantino Stars: Leonardo DiCaprio, Brad Pitt, Margot Robbie There is a lot of talent up on the screen with Tarantino's latest film. His usual verve is splashed up on the screen through incredible production design and exciting direction. DiCarpio and Pitt are in true top form. However...I could NOT get past how disjointed this film felt for me. This is three films in one...two that deserved their own movies and one that is completely pointless. The story of DiCaprio's Rick Dalton, an aging star dealing with his star falling...is great...and I wanted an entire movie. Pitt's Cliff Booth story and his run-ins with the Manson Family...is great...and I wanted an entire movie...and it has nothing to do with DiCaprio's. Finally...why on earth is Margot Robbie in this film? If you delete every one of here scenes...the film doesn't change at all. There is a lot of fun to be had here but the whole is far less than the sum of its parts. B Digital |
OSCARS
Best Picture
Best Director Best Original Screenplay Best International Film Best Editing Best Production Design Kevin's Pick
Best Supporting Actor
Best International Film |
Parasite
Dir: Bong Joon Ho Stars: Kang-Ho Song I love Korean cinema, and have for years. However..I have never been a big fan of Bong Joon Ho. I prefer masters Chan Wook-Park and Jee-Woon Kim. However, Parasite is on a whole other level than Ho's The Host, Okja, Mother and Snowpiercer. It tells the story of a down-on-their-luck family that cons their way into the lives of a well-to-do family. It isn't much more complicated than that (with a few curveballs), but it is so meticulously crafted that it is near-perfect. It is funny, exciting, frightening, and just overall a powerful message about class stratification. Don't let that chase you away. It is far more entertaining than that sounds. A- |
Pet Semetary
Dir: Kevin Kolsch & Dennis Widmyer Stars: Jason Clarke, John Lithgow There isn't anything particularly BAD about this film...in fact...it is quite well directed. However, it just doesn't seem to have any teeth. It is moody more than scary. It is simple. It is predictable. And for some reason they are REALLY intent on making Jason Clarke's wife important in the story somehow, and they fail miserably. If I had one good takeaway from the film, it would have to be Lithgow's fun performance, which teeters between unsettling and ridiculous. It won't insult you...but you won't get much out of Pet Semetary. C+ |
Plus One
Dir: Jeff Chan & Andrew Rhymer Stars: Jack Quaid, Maya Erskine Ben and Alice have been best friends forever...but they are always unlucky in love. This summer is going to be especially excruciating because they each have several weddings to attend. Well...why don't they be each other's wingman by being each other's Plus One. Yeah...it is an incredibly corny premise and you know exactly where it is all going. So it hinges on the characters, right? Well..Jack Quaid has the charm of his father and Maya Erskine is a delight...so they go a long way toward making this film work. However, the characters fall in to that RomCom trap where they act like idiots because the plot requires them to do so...and I can't stand that. B- |
Pokemon Detective Pikachu
Dir: Rob Letterman Stars: Ryan Reynolds, Justice Smith, Ken Watanabe, Bill Nighy Throughout Pokemon Detective Pikachu, I kept waiting for the movie to show purpose. Was this just a reason to put the beloved Pokemon on the big screen? Yes! It really is all there is to the film. The story is so cliche of a kid wondering what happened to his father. The world of Pokemon is taken for granted and there is NO explanation as to what a Pokemon trainer is, or how pokeballs work, or any sort of mythology. That matter-of-fact attitude of this world, which is impressively realized, sucked the life right out of the film. The effects are a hoot, and Reynolds was an inspired choice to voice Pikachu, but there isn't much here other than for the kiddies. C |
Ready or Not
Dir: Matt Bitinelli-Opin Stars: Samara Weaving, Adam Brody Sometimes all the sole needs is a batshit, goofball kind of comedy/thriller such as Ready or Not. The story, and the execution of said story...could not be simpler. A beautiful woman is marrying into a board-game empire family. As per tradition, they have to play a game on the wedding night...and the fact that Grace choose "Hide & Seek" is apparently an ominous sign. It is minutes until the family is out to murder her....and hi-jinks ensue. Samara Weaving is a star...and that is most of this film's success. She commands the screen with her beauty, intensity, and even comic timing. It is glorious mayhem with a finale that is SO satisfying. B |
Richard Jewell
Dir: Clint Eastwood Stars: Paul Walter Hauser, Sam Rockwell, Kathy Bates, Olivia Wilde, Jon Hamm Clint Eastwood can still direct the hell out of a small, concentrated drama with the best of them. Paul Walter Hauser gives a career performance as the titular character, who became Public Enemy #1 after being suspected as the Olympic Park bomber. This is a dramatic procedural of the highest order. Richard is a kind, trusting man who had no allies...and it is is pitiful and infuriating. The man was so naive that he basically brought the world down upon himself. I was so tense this entire film...and it is right in Eastwood's wheelhouse. B+ |
OSCARS
Best Original Song
Best Costume Design
Best Makeup & Hairstyling Best Original Song |
Rocketman
Dir: Dexter Fletcher Stars: Taron Egerton, Jamie Bell, Richard Madden Taron Egerton is now an A-list star. His transformative performance as Elton John in Rocketman is nothing less than sublime. He sings, emotes, and simultaneously captures the extroverted obnoxiousness of the performer as well as the introverted emotion. The film is a fantastical musical, and the traditional musical numbers don't quite work and feel unnatural. However, when the musical number is Egerton performing as John in front of an audience...it is sublime. "Crocodile Rock" may be one of my favorite scenes of the year! B+ |
Shazam!
Dir: David F. Sandberg Stars: Zachary Levi, Mark Strong Shazam! is 100% all about Zachary Levi. He has such charm, such comedic timing, and such enthusiasm playing a 14-year-old boy given Superman-like powers, that it makes the overall film a success. Well...to be fair...I will give some credit to Jack Dylan Grazer who plays Billy's foster brother. But the rest of the film, is paint-by-numbers. Mark Strong? Same faceless, pointless, directionless villain that DC is famous for. The kid-level stuff? Totally unbelievable. Nobody stands around these days when bullies push down and kick disabled kids in the stomach. A lot of the fights and effects don't really rise above average either. But Levi steals the show...and we needed more of him. B |
The Silence
Dir: John R. Leonetti Stars: Stanley Tucci, Miranda Otto, John Corbett, Kiernan Shipka I am not going to go too deep into what movie was written first, when they went into production, or anything else of the sort. The fact of the matter is that I saw The Silence done much better with John Krasinski's A Quiet Place. That is not to say that The Silence is awful, it isn't. It is just a cheaper retread. The trope of having a deaf daughter to allow the family to communicate without making noise in this dangerous world felt brilliant in the first film, it felt lazy here. The monsters are essentially flying Gremlins, so it is cornier than the frightening monsters in A Quiet Place. I can go on and on, but it is just a lesser film in every way. It is White House Down to AQP's Olympus Has Fallen. C |
Slaughterhouse Rulez
Dir: Crispian Mills Stars: Asa Butterfield, Michael Sheen, Simon Pegg, Nick Frost This film was just not well-executed. This is about a fancy boarding school...and it is definitely TOO MUCH about that fancy boarding school. It feels like 80% of the film follows the school politics, the bullies, the romances...and I really could not have cared less. I saw Sheen, Pegg, and Frost were part of this film and they got me on board. However, with the SLIGHT exception of Pegg, the filmmakers didn't know what to do with them. Then the weird dog monsters show up and everyone runs for their lives. But Why? Fracking? Yeah...but why? C |
Spider-Man: Far From Home
Dir: John Watts Stars: Tom Holland, Samuel L. Jackson, Jake Gyllenhaal, Zendaya, Cobie Smulders Tom Holland's Spider-Man is the best version of the web-slinger that we have ever had. Finally, in the follow-up to Spider-Man: Homecoming and the Avengers films, we have a Peter Parker whose powers really give him conflict between being a hero and being a teenager. This outing, is standard Marvel fare. The threat is a perfect evolution of something that has been right in front of our face throughout the MCU. Gyllenhaal lights up the screen as Quentin "Mysterio" Beck. Jackson feels bored with the role at this point...but that MIGHT have been on purpose. However...overall...it is the Tom Holland Show and he is great. I may even go as far as saying that I liked everything with Peter out of the suit more so than in. Also, this film had my favorite post-credit sequences yet. B |
St. Agatha
Dir: Darren Lynn Bousman Stars: Sabrina Kern, Carolyn Hennessy It has been a while since I have enjoyed one of Darren Lynn Bousman's horror outings. He made my favorite Saw movie and his Death Sentence is masterful. Here, with St. Agatha, he has made a tense, unnerving film that goes in directions you don't expect. Kern and Hennessy butt heads in wonderful ways as an unmarried pregnant woman sent to a convent and the head nun tasked with taking care of her. The secrets and harsh realities of the convent are a hoot to discover. B |
OSCARS
Best Original Score
Best Visual Effects |
Star Wars Episode IX:
The Rise of Skywalker Dir: JJ Abrams Stars: Daisy Ridley, Adam Driver, Oscar Isaac, John Boyega Say what you will about The Last Jedi, but Rian Johnson took some chances and created an unexpected, unique Star Wars film. I dug the hell out of it. Most of that backlash was there was not enough fan-service. Well, The Rise of Skywalker is ALL fan service...and it is certainly to its detriment. Out of left field, we have Emperor Palpatine back and it is tiresome instead of exciting. Lando Calrissian makes an appearance...and he seems incredibly bored by it all. Not only that...but the screenplay is so rushed and convenient...that the film feels like a 150-minute clipshow. That all being said...Rey and Kylo are magnetic characters and it saves this film from slipping into prequel mediocrity. B |
Stuber
Dir: Michael Dowse Stars: Kumail Nanjiani, Dave Bautista I kind of hated the silliness surrounding a temporarily blinded cop hijacking his Uber driver to act as his chauffeur while on a hot case. It is so unbelievably stupid that it takes a lot away from Stuber. However, to give credit where credit is due...the two stars are pretty funny...and Nanjiani really steals the show and proves what great chops he has. On top of that...some of the action is enjoyable. So the film is prettu dumb and forgettable but it served its purpose. B- |
Super Size Me 2: Holy Chicken
Dir: Morgan Spurlock Super Size Me was a fun gimmick that has a handful of interesting points to be made. 15 years later...Morgan Spurlock has very much matured and offered a sequel to his stunt documentary that really skewers the chicken industry, that really prides itself on being the humane, healthy alternative to beef. To watch the hoops Spurlock has to jump through in order to open his own chicken sandwich restaurant is fascinating, funny, and infuriating. "Cage Free", "Hormone Free", "Free Range"...wait until you see how little that means. Not as obvious as eating MacDonald's for 30 days straight is bad for your health. Far more mature and interesting. B+ |
Tangent Room
Dir: Bjorn Engstrom Stars: Lisa Bearpark, Daniel Epstein I didn't have much hope. It is a buried Sci-Fi movie on Amazon Prime. The trailer showed that is was incredibly cheap. It is only an hour long. BUT...I can sometimes find little gems this way. NOT THE CASE. Look at that poster! This is not hyperbole but that poster is infinitely more interesting than this waste of time. It involves two universes colliding, or something, and the focal point is a room where 4 brainiacs have been locked in. The acting is SO bad, there is no plot exposition, and this proves to me that I can make a movie this afternoon starring my dogs and it will be better than this. Why do I torture myself? F |
Tell Me Who I Am
Dir: Ed Perkins The story of this documentary is fascinating. Marcus and Alex are identical twins, but when they were 18, Alex was in a motorcycle accident that completely wiped his memory. So Marcus takes it upon himself to re-teach Alex about his life, his friends, and his family. If the film were ONLY about that, the doc still would have been superb. However, the moral, ethical, and philosophical dilemma that arises will rip your conscience apart. What if your twin lost his memory and doesn't remember some HORRIBLE things from his past. Would you tell him? Should you? A- |
Terminator: Dark Fate
Dir: Tim Miller Voices: Linda Hamilton, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Mackenzie Davis Terminator: Dark Fate exceeded nearly every expectation I had. The past few Terminator movies were a mess. Rise of the Machines was goofy, Salvation had no heart, and the less said about Genisys, the better. However, the filmmakers went with a direct sequel to T2, and it is fantastic. Linda Hamilton is still a bad-ass. Arnold embraces his age perfectly here. Also...Mackenzie Davis gives us an amazingly entertaining action heroine here. No "bad" terminator will ever live up to Robert Patrick's T-1000, but Gabriel Luna comes close. The combination of the liquid metal and robotic terminators has been done before...but never this well. I had a great time and I thought I would be grasping at straws with this one. B |
OSCARS
Kevin's Pick
Best Animated Film
|
Toy Story 4
Dir:Josh Cooley Voices: The Usual Did Toy Story 4 need to be made? Nah. Toy Story 3 is one of the very best of all of Pixar's films and it SO perfectly concluded the story of Woody, Buzz, and the gang. But here we are...and the Toy Story franchise is out to make another billion dollars...and these filmmakers can still basically do no wrong. Woody is front and center (Buzz is almost irrelevant) and he is out in the world, trying to find Bo Peep, and trying to decide if she REALLY needs to get back to his human, and figuring out his purpose. It is sweet, gorgeous, and funny. It is everything you would expect from Pixar and Toy Story....even if you were clamoring for something original from this master studio. B+ |
Triple Frontier
Dir: JC Chandor Stars: Ben Affleck, Oscar Isaac, Charlie Hunam, Garrett Hedlund, Pedro Pascal The premise is simple. Five ex-special forces comrades team up once again to rob a drug lord in South America. Look at that cast!! I could watch a film of these 5 men eating breakfast and be entertained. They make the film enjoyable. It is exciting, competent, and beautiful. It may have peaked too soon and the excitement sort of peters out. Also, I would have preferred a bit of Treasure of the Sierra Madre paranoia in this story. But I digress...this is a pretty solid actioner. B |
Unicorn Store
Dir: Brie Larson Stars: Brie Larson, Samuel L. Jackson, Joan Cusack, Bradley Whitford, Mamoudou Athie Brie Larson's directorial debut has a lot of problems. It is tonally uneven, its balance between whimsy and reality are oddly unbalanced, and its light-speed plot progression is distracting. But damn if Larson didn't charm the hell out of me. She plays Kit, a child-like woman artist who has given up painting and entered corporate America. it is then an enigmatic man offers her the chance to own her very own unicorn. As I hoped the film would unfold in one way, I was invested. When it didn't, I was still charmed enough to enjoy myself. Incredibly lighthearted with enjoyable characters (especially Athie), Unicorn Store was a nice surprise. B |
Us
Dir: Jordan Peele Stars: Lupita Nyong'o, Winston Duke, Elizabeth Moss It is fitting that Jordan Peele is the host and producer of The Twilight Zone. Because with Get Out and now Us, he is a Twilight Zone-style director. As with his previous film, Peele brings his extraordinary directorial talents to Us and provides us with a terrifying exercise about a family who is being terrorized by their doubles. And, as with his previous film, reveals toward the end get a little batshit crazy. Throughout Us, due to the direction, the score, and Nyong'o's great performance(s), I was tense and exhilarated. The reveals were a bit too vague and lazy to really drive the film home. Still...I haven't been this scared in the theater for a long time, so props to Peele. B |
Velvet Buzzsaw
Dir: Dan Gilroy Stars: Jake Gyllenhaal, Rene Russo, John Malkovich, Toni Collette, Zawe Ashton Dan Gilroy's previous outing with Jake Gyllenhaal and Rene Russo has a certain kind of brilliance. His follow-up, Velvet Buzzsaw is a bit odd, albeit enjoyable. It tells a story about the pretentious, modern art scene. A young dealer comes across an amazing collection of art belonging to her recently deceased neighbor. The neighbor wanted them all destroyed. The hipster art dealers don't care. Enter supernatural forces in the paintings that start killing everyone. Yep. This is a pretty, well-acted, absurdist film. The ins and outs of the art world stuff is not fleshed out enough. The horror aspects aren't scary enough or have clear rules. So what the film is is a mish-mash. It is a shame, because Gilroy is a hell of a filmmaker. B- |
The Wandering Earth
Dir: Frant Gwo Stars: Jing Wu Can $700M Chinese dollars be that wrong? Not really! The Wandering Earth is an insane Sci-Fi extravaganza that is equal parts Armageddon, Sunshine, The Day After Tomorrow, and a bit of WALL-E. Say what you will about some choppy CGI, plot holes, and editing snafus...what you can't say is that this movie is not ambitious. I mean...who would attempt to make a movie about building 11,000 "Earth Engines" to propel the entire planet out of the solar system, only to get caught in Jupiter's gravity. You may shake your head at some of the ridiculousness of it all, but you will have a great time completely in spite of it. B |
White Chamber
Dir: Paul Raschid Stars: Shauna MacDonald, Oded Fehr It started off so strong. We are initially treated to an Oded Fehr-narrated prologue about a Civil War-ravaged UK in the near future. Then we are shown a woman, in a white room, who is tortured in very cool, futuristic ways. I was all in! Then the film smash-cuts to "5 Days Ago", and all of the excitement is immediately drained and it becomes pretty lame. What a letdown. If you are going to start off so strong and minimalist...you should keep it that way. No need to expand the world and philosphies. Look how good Cube is! This could have been like that. C- |
Wine Country
Dir: Amy Poehler Stars: Amy Poehler, Rachel Dratch, Ana Gasteyer, Maya Rudolph, Tina Fey, Jason Schwartzman This really isn't a movie. These funny SNL ladies went on one of these Napa Valley trips years ago...so they fictionalized their experience. Imagine what there trip was originally like. A bunch of comediennes making quips, funny voices, and puns. Well...that is what the movie is like. It's "plot" is one of their 50th Bdays, but it is nothing more than some the funniest women SNL ever had to offer goofing off. It is a shame because they ARE funny...but they totally forgot to make a movie while they were enjoying themselves. C |
X-Men: Dark Phoenix
Dir: Simon Kinberg Stars: Sophie Turner, James McAvoy, Michael Fassbender, Nicholas Hoult, Jennifer Lawrence, Tye Sheridan I am so happy that Disney/Marvel has acquired the rights to the X-Men franchise, because this new generation of mutants has been getting worse and worse. This installment, is just terrible. I wouldn't have thought that this Dark Phoenix iteration would have been worse than X-Men: The Last Stand. Sophie Turner is just awful as Jean Gray...and everyone else is just bored. Then the social commentary whereby one violent mutant turns the entire world against the entire race of mutants is just ridiculous. All the life is gone from this franchise. Disney NEEDS to reboot it. D |
Yesterday
Dir: Danny Boyle Stars: Himesh Patel, Lily James, Kate McKinnon, Ed Sheeran I had been looking forward to this movie more than any movie in a long time. Danny Boyle, one ofmy favorites. Written by Richard "Love Actually" Curtis. Wonderful premise whereby the world forgets the Beatles ever existed, except for one struggling musician. Expectations were "favorite movie of the year-level" through the roof. When all was said and done...it was just OK. Lily James steals the show out from underneath Patel, who was, possibly purposefully, bland. Kate McKinnon bugged me to no end portraying a record executive that is unlike any real person you've ever encountered. Also, there was never a great, beginning-to-end performance of any song...and that felt really strange. The movie does get across the timelessness and uniqueness of Beatles' music...but doesn't inject that heart into it that a movie like this needed to do. There is also something that HAD to happen during the finale, as it was RIGHT there, and when it didn't, I was deflated. The movie is simultaneously too long and too rushed. Still...there is an enthusiasm here that is still undeniable. I just wanted it to be so much more. B |
Zombieland
Dir: Ruben Fleischer Stars: Woody Harrelson, Jesse Eisenberg, Emma Stone, Abigail Breslin, Zoey Deutch Ten years after the original Zombie romp...we didn't really need a sequel. In 2009...Zombieland was different and fresh. In 2019...the gimmick feels a bit stale. The four leads have far outgrown this nonsense, but they are still pretty fun. The best in show is Zoey Deutch. Whenever I found myself getting a little bored...she would inject a lot of life and laughs into the proceedings. Totally unnecessary...but ultimately harmless fun. B |