2000 Movies
OSCARS Won/Nominated
IMDB Top 250
IMDB Top 250
OSCARS
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Almost Famous
Dir: Cameron Crowe Stars: Billy Crudup, Kate Hudson, Patrick Fugit, Jason Lee, Frances McDormand, Zooey Deschanel, Philip Seymour Hoffman, Jimmy Fallon What a movie. This movie has it all. It has the coming-of-age story, the fear of stardom tropes, the worship of idols, the love of music...I can go on and on. But all of this is wrapped up in a beautiful 1970s tapestry that feels 100% authentic and warm. Patrick Fugit isn't a great actor but that kind of plays for he is the naive outsider to these musicians and groupies that really open his eyes to the outside, depraved, but lovely world that his mother was trying to protect him from. This is a great feel good movie and it never feels fake or preachy. One of my favorites. A DVD |
American Psycho
Dir: Mary Harron Stars: Christian Bale, Justin Theroux, Josh Lucas, Chloe Sevigny, Reese Witherspoon This is a very odd movie with drastic tonal problems. It is too funny to be a thriller or a horror, and it is too disturbing and violent to really be a comedy. So it sits in genre limbo and makes the entire experience, while unique and captivating, a bit confusing and intangible. Christian Bale is great, but his character acts so odd and the violent outbursts and Huey Lewis music feels so forced. "Look how crazy he is...this makes no sense!!" That is how I felt so I couldn't really click into theis one. B |
Battle Royale
Dir: Kinji Fukasaku The Hunger Games most obviously ripped this movie off, and jettisoned what it needed to be a truly great movie. The Hunger Games did great dystopic-world building and relationship building which really made you care about the participants in the contest and the society surrounding it. Battle Royale certainly lacks in those areas...but it excels in an arguably more crucial area. These are definitely kids...all 9th graders...in school uniforms. So to see them attack each other is very disturbing and destroys their innocence. Also...this is rated R. And a fight-to-the-death competition with various weapons HAS to be. So it is ugly, gruesome, and shocking in the way it should be. If these two movies were combined...it would have really been something special. B |
Bedazzled
Dir: Harold Ramis Stars: Brendan Fraser, Elizabeth Hurley, Frances O'Conner Back in the day, Brendan Fraser was quite a charming actor, and Elizabeth Hurley was a giant pile of sex. Using the two of them to remake this comedy as a loser who makes a deal with the devil for 7 wishes was a great idea. This is a tame, pleasant comedy that hinges on Fraser, and he really exhibits a chameleon-like ability to play many different personnas, all to pitch perfection. Frances O'Conner as his object of desire isn't quite up to the task...but since the film is so focused on Fraser...it doesn't really matter. To watch him go through his wishes...wishes most of us would make ourselves, and watching how Hurley screws them up...it a lot of fun. B DVD |
Best In Show
Dir: Christopher Guest Stars: Christopher Guest, Eugene Levy, Michael McKean, Catherine O'Hara, Jennifer Coolidge, Parker Posey I usually enjoy Christopher Guest fare. It is usually reserved, clever comedy with goofball characters. This time though, I just couldn't enjoy myself. Almost every one of these characters, each obsessive to a different degree about their show dogs, are so excruciatingly irritating that I ceased to find them funny. C- |
The Boondock Saints
Dir: Troy Duffy Stars: Willem Dafoe, Sean Patrick Flannery, Norman Reedus Sure, the basic premise behind this movie, where two Irish brothers feel it is their cosmic duty to kill mafioso, is simple. Sure, our lead actors can be described as bland. Sure, this movie doesn't break the mold very much. But I loved it. Troy Duffy is talented behind the lens, and the storytelling technique of flash forwards and flash backs works 100% is invigorating. Also...Willem Dafoe chews so much scenery that Nicholas Cage would be embarrassed for him. Ultra-violent, ultra-profane, and ultra-fun. B+ |
Bring it On
Dir: Peyton Reed Stars: Kirsten Dunst, Gabrielle Union, Eliza Dushku, Jesse Bradford This movie is just so superficial. When the movie doesn't seem to respect the central characters or their passion...it is hard to really buy into their struggles and sympathize. This movie seems to think cheerleaders are vapid idiots...and it drives that fact home so thoroughly that you don't care if they succeed. C- |
OSCARS
Best Actor
Best Sound |
Cast Away
Dir: Robert Zemeckis Stars: Tom Hanks, Helen Hunt What Hanks and Zemeckis accomplished here was astounding. They filmed the first half of the movie, went on hiatus for 6 months where Zemeckis made What Lies Beneath, and then finished the film with a transformed Hanks. Not only that, but this is a movie that is all Hanks and sound design, for there is no costars and no music until 3/4 of the way through. I just really wish the trailers didn't give away the entire ending, right down to the final shot (which being ignorant of is infinitely more powerful). To spoil a movie such as this sucks a LOT of the tension, danger, and fear right out of the film. Even so...it is pretty brilliant...and no one other than Hanks could have pulled this off so admirably. A- DVD |
OSCARS
Best Makeup
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The Cell
Dir: Tarsem Singh Stars: Jennifer Lopez, Vince Vaughn, Vincent D'Onofrio My first foray into the visual artist known as Tarsem Singh, and he truly is that, and artist. The science-fiction trope of entering the mind was en vogue after 1999's The Matrix, and they used that trope as a way to enter the mind of a comatose serial killer as a way to find his latest kidnapping victim. The set up and the story are fine, but the star here is the visual effects and the production design. It is like being in a waking nightmare. The visual style of this film is so powerful that you are unnerved, uneasy, and flat out frightened, even though the film makes it obvious that you are absurdly inside the consciousness of a killer. Still...it is breathtaking. B |
Charlie's Angels
Dir: McG Stars: Drew Barrymore, Cameron Diaz, Lucy Liu, Bill Murray, Sam Rockwell Completely exploitative, as it is constantly just showing and telling us how gorgeous the leads are. Also forgets itself as it is obvious that the filmmakers and the girls were out to have FUN instead of making quality cinema. Its obnoxiously stupid as well. All that being said...some of the charm is unavoidable. I think they are gorgeous, the fun is infectious, and Murray and Rockwell are great. I guess its fine. B- DVD |
Chicken Run
Dir: Peter Lord & Nick Park Voices: Mel Gibson I think that sometimes, these claymation and other stop-motion movies, are overpraised because of how difficult they must be to make. I can certainly appreciate the skill and tediousness this film must require, but that doesn't mean it is better than it is. This is effectively a prison break movie, and its simply mediocre. B- |
OSCARS
Best Picture
Best Actress Best Supporting Actress Best Adapted Screenplay Best Original Score |
Chocolat
Dir: Lasse Hallstrom Stars: Juliette Binoche, Judi Dench, Johnny Depp, Alfred Molina Pretty simple story. Woman and daughter open up a new chocolate shop in a small French town, across from the church, and they are open on Sundays "GASP". But, this movie is seductive. The gorgeous people, the gorgeous production, and the mesmerizing chocolate creations make it harmless and sweet, no pun intended. B |
Coyote Ugly
Dir: David McNally Stars: Piper Perabo, Maria Bello, John Goodman, Tyra Banks, Bridget Moynahan Movies that try to have it both ways kind of irritate me. The Coyote Ugly girls are beautiful women, dressed scantily, dancing on the bar, for the sole purpose to titillate men. Then the movie wants us to feel bad about objectifying them. I don't buy it. The filmmakers or actors aren't up to the task to give nearly any of these women any character or depth. They are models using their beauty to lore patrons into a bar. That's it. When the movie tries to tell me they are more than that...I wasn't convinced. C |
OSCARS
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Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon
Dir: Ang Lee Stars: Chow Yun-Fat, Michelle Yeoh, Ziyi Zhang 1001 Movies You Must See Before You Die Essentially a martial-arts ballet, this movie is one of the most exceptionally beautiful movies of all time. Ang Lee takes a rather familiar Martial Arts story and injects this poetic style that makes it all seem energetic, unique, and whimsical. A lesser filmmaker would not have been able to pull this off, because the idea of sword-wielding warriors floating through trees and bouncing off rooftops is absurd. There is no reason or explanation. These aren't superheroes or phantoms. They are just people flying, and it totally works because you are virtually hypnotized. A- DVD |
Dinosaur
Dir: Eric Leighton & Ralph Zondag Voices: DB Sweeney, Alfre Woodard, Juliana Margulies, Hayden Panittiere By today's standards, the animation is a bit weak...but for 2000, this non-pixar Disney Animated film looked pretty incredible. The story is classic Disney, with an orphaned dino, raised by lemurs, looking for a new home once his is destroyed by a meteor. It is an adventure with a bunch of colorful characters, as you have seen a million times, and this one is just fine. B- DVD |
Dude, Where's My Car
Dir: Danny Leiner Stars: Ashton Kutcher, Seann William Scott, Jennifer Garner For those of you who thought The Hangover was something novel, remember this movie did the whole "What Happened last night?" trope many years before. However, this one did it much more innocently. Sure our idiot heroes do drugs and are obsessed with sex...but the comedy is much more ridiculous and much less depraved. To watch the lengths that these two buffoons go to track down this Continuum Transfunctioner is a riot. B- DVD |
Duets
Dir: Bruce Paltrow Stars: Maria Bello, Andre Braugher, Huey Lewis, Paul Giamatti, Gwenyth Paltrow This movie tries to pretend that Karaoke is important. Sure...I agree it is fun...but this movie isn't good enough to make us believe that singing to famous songs at seedy bars is life-affirming or therapeutic. Some of the performances are fine, like Huey Lewis and Paltrow doing "Cruisin'" and Braugher's "Free Bird"...but the central conceit just doesn't work. These are boobs singing in bars. C+ |
OSCARS
Best Original Song
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The Emperor's New Groove
Dir: Mark Dindal Voices: David Spade, John Goodman, Patrick Warburton Meh...this is a totally forgettable, farcical entry into the Disney canon. If it weren't for Patrick Warburton's performance as Kronk, a performance good enough to spawn a sequel, then this movie would be pretty much forgotten. Come to think of it, it is pretty much forgotten anyway C+ |
OSCARS
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Erin Brockovich
Dir: Steven Soderbergh Stars: Julia Roberts, Albert Finney Sometimes when a talented person makes a movie about an iconic, real person...the role outweighs the performance to a level where the actor/actress gets an oscar because of it. I never thought Julia Roberts was a great actress. She is fine...but nothing special. Here, she is portraying quite an iconic woman who fought for the little person against the powerful...and to not give her an oscar is almost politically incorrect. Taking all the politics out of it....this movie is mediocre at best with a titular performance that is forcing it the entire time. C+ |
The Family Man
Dir: Brett Ratner Stars: Nicholas Cage, Tea Leoni This premise is as cornball as it gets. Workoholic schmuck gets the chance to go see what his life would be like if he didn't take that business trip so many years ago and married his girlfriend. Well...his life would have turned into a Norman Rockwell painting...and to watch Cage fall in love with Leoni all over again and watching him fall in love with this wholesome, comfortable life, is infectious and completely satisfying. B |
Final Destination
Dir: James Wong Stars: Ali Larter, Seann William Scott, Tony Scott The premise behind this movie was brilliant. Death comes for us all, and he will get you no matter what. So when a high-schooler has a premonition of his plane crashing just after takeoff, and forces himself and a few classmates off, only to watch the plane crash from the terminal...we know they are all going to get theirs...because you can't cheat death. This created an atmosphere and a sense of dread while we all watch Rube Goldberg-esque situations build up to overtly ridiculous and impossible deaths into an orgasm of delight. I can't say that these movies are scary per se...but they are an incredible amount of fun. How will the next person die? It can be anyone and everything can be the cause. B+ DVD |
OSCARS
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Gladiator
Dir: Ridley Scott Stars: Russell Crowe, Joaquin Phoenix, Connie Nielsen, Richard Harris, Djimon Hounsou, Oliver Reed, Derek Jacobi 1001 Movies You Must See Before You Die IMDB #47 Simply the best sword-and-sandal epic of the modern age. What Ridley Scott has accomplished here is a perfect period piece, with action, drama, and historical perpective in equal parts that is presented flawlessly. Russell Crowe is a badass, but there is a depth to his character where you feel his desperation and sadness behind his fury. Phoenix is an astonishingly effective villain, and the production design is as good as any movie ever...right on par with the Lord of the Rings trilogy. You believe you are in rome, you believe these people are in the middle of a brutal conflict, and Hans Zimmer's gorgeous score leaves your heart swelling. A- DVD |
The Gleaners and I
Dir: Agnes Varda 1001 Movies You Must See Before You Die This documentary starts off focusing on those poor people who pick fields and orchards clean, and how the law allows for this, after the various harvest seasons are over. It is interesting and poignant about how much food is wasted, even in the rural countryside of France. But then the film devolves into a weird story about people finding useful things in the garbage and the filmmaker being amazed by what new digital photography allows her the freedom to do. It was confused and unfocused...the film didn't know what it wanted to be, and it was ultimately disappointing. Gleaning is one thing. Hoarding and sifting through the garbage is related but a totally different thing. C |
Gone in 60 Seconds
Dir: Dominic Sena Stars: Nicholas Cage, Angelina Jolie, Robert Duvall, Chi McBride, Giovanni Ribisi, Vinnie Jones, Delroy Lindo, Timothy Olyphant, Christopher Eccleston Sometimes you re-watch a movie and never quite understand why you rated it higher before. I used to like this movie, and I gave it a B...but I re-watched it and man is it a bore. This is a movie about stealing 50 cars in one night...and it shows people walking up to cars, clipping a wire, and driving away..dozens of times. The final chase with "Eleanor" is exciting...but the rest is a movie about planning for the last 15 minutes. Even the characters aren't given anything to do. This guy is a computer wizard...never used. This guy can drive ANYTHING...never used. I kept shaking my head at the banality of this film. Big-time downgrade.. C- DVD |
High Fidelity
Dir: Stephen Frears Voices: John Cusack, Jack Black, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Tim Robbins I know a lot of people that are obsessed with this movie, because it is a clever premise where we meet a record store worker who always makes lists about everything and is in the process of listing his top 5 breakups, one of which is going on now. If I take anything away from this movie, it is Jack Black...because everything else is actually unpleasant and Cusack is not a guy to sympathize with or root for...and that is a severe problem. C- |
OSCARS
Best Visual Effects
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Hollow Man
Dir: Paul Verhoeven Stars: Kevin Bacon, Elizabeth Shue, Josh Brolin I Praise Paul Verhoeven for taking the premise of an invisible man to the depraved, gross, uncomfortable place that most people expect it should. Most men, if invisible, would use it for personal gain and sexual satisfaction...so props there. Also...the effects are astonishingly well done. Props again. But...the acting is SO broad as to slip into B-movie territory. The tone of these scientists is so comic-book level obnoxious, that what is happening is excruciatingly cartoonish. It is such a shame because if this was played subdued and creepy instead of ostentatious and super-villainy...it would have been a great movie instead of just a visual delight. D+ |
How the Grinch Stole Christmas
Dir: Ron Howard Stars: Jim Carrey, Jeffrey Tambor, Christine Baranski Let's get the fact that the makeup and design of this movie is gorgeous and second to none. Also...Carrey is pretty damn funny for almost the entire film. My slight issue with this movie is the tone of the Grinch himself. I think the grinch has to be a bit more sour, a bit more angry, and a bit more sinister to be effective. Carrey plays him as a clown...essentially Ace Ventura or the Riddler in massive makeup effects. It makes the actual story of redemption and acceptance not work...because he is more of an off-the-wall psychopath than he is a sad, nefarious villain. B |
The Ladies Man
Dir: Reginald Hudlin Stars: Tim Meadows, Will Ferrell Not every SNL skit deserves an entire movie, and this is a perfect example. Tim Meadows as an afro-tastic, lisping womanizer on the radio, giving advice, and usually getting weirded out, was hysterical. To stretch that thin idea out into a feature length film just didn't work. It has to do with a bunch of men banding together in the mutual hatred of this guy who is sleeping with their wives. It's pretty silly and uninteresting...but there is funny people involved so it is kinda harmless. C |
The Legend of Bagger Vance
Dir: Robert Redford Stars: Matt Damon, Will Smith, Charlize Theron This is cornball city, using the wise, spiritual black man as the one to guide the troubled white guy through life. In this situation, it is a young man, who was the town's pride playing golf, returning from war and squandering his gift. In this depression-laden community, Charlize Theron tries to throw a golf tournament. All the beats will be familiar to you, but the atmosphere is so pleasant and warm that it goes down smooth. Smith's characterization may be a BIT racially insensitive...but it also kind of works. B DVD |
Little Nicky
Dir: Steven Brill Stars: Adam Sandler, Patricia Arquette, Harvey Keitel, Rhys Ifans Ugh...I can't stand it when Adam Sandler tries SO hard to create a goofball, slapstick character that does not resemble anything in real life. It worked once, in Billy Madison. Here...it is infuriatingly bad. It isn't bad enough to play the son of the devil as a simpleton...you have to play him as this absurd, hunched over, accented to almost incomprehensible level buffoon who is treated like his mere presence is enough for comedy. I really dislike crap like this. D+ |
OSCARS
Best Original Song
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Meet the Parents
Dir: Jay Roach Stars: Ben Stiller, Robert DeNiro 1001 Movies You Must See Before You Die This is considered a comedy classic...but I disagree. Sure...it is a fun story and is well made and well acted...but I fail to find the comedy in this movie. Ben Stiller is a good guy and just wants to marry his girlfriend. Her dad effectively psychologically tortures him to the point of sabotaging his daughter's relationship because he is a huge, cynical asshole. It is sad and unpleasant. There are some laughs to be had, for sure, but the atmosphere is horrible and not good for comedy. You should watch comedies to feel good...not to depress yourself. C+ |
Me, Myself & Irene
Dir: The Farrelly Brothers Stars: Jim Carrey, Renee Zellweger, Chris Cooper, Richard Jenkins Jim Carrey doing R-rated humor is a lot of fun. He gets to play both a completely passive loser and an overtly crass asshole...and he does both of them well. His back and forths with Zellweger are great and she is a good sport. But the real stars of this movie is his three black sons. Their scenes, even when they are young, steal every second of focus from Jim Carrey...a near impossible feat. They are so profane but so smart....I can't get enough. You could do a lot worse than this for vulgar R-rated humor. B DVD |
Men of Honor
Dir: George Tillman, Jr. Voices: Cuba Gooding, Jr., Robert DeNiro, Charlize Theron When you have actors of this caliber, portraying an important, inspirational story about the first African-American Navy diver and his instructor, and it is this bland and forgettable...you have a serious problem. It has some exciting training scenes...but any time the movie seems to knock on the door of importance or dramatic, it falls victim of sentimentality. C |
Miss Congeniality
Dir: Donald Petrie Stars: Sandra Bullock, Michael Caine, Benjamin Bratt, Candice Bergen, William Shatner It is a good thing that Sandra Bullock has so much charisma, is such a good actress, is so funny, and can carry a movie almost effortlessly...because it is because of her that this stupid movie about an FBI agent going undercover in the beauty pageant world is even tolerable. The premise is so stupid an unbelievable...but the movie works because Bullock pulls it all off admirably. B- |
Mission Impossible II
Dir: John Woo Stars: Tom Cruise, Thandie Newton, Dougray Scott, Ving Rhames, Richard Roxburgh, Brendan Gleeson People like to crap all over this entry into the Mission Impossible franchise, mostly because of John Woo's direction. Well...I don't think that is entirely fair. I agree that this is the worst film in the franchise, but it is an outstanding franchise with an extraordinarily high bar of quality. John Woo's style is VERY different to what American audiences are used to, with hyperstylized slow-motion...and probably too much of it. But come on. It has a great cold open, great globetrotting, and top notch action scenes. You don't need anything much more than that. Maybe less doves. B- Bluray |
Mission to Mars
Dir: Brian DePalma Stars: Gary Sinise, Tim Robbins, Don Cheadle, Connie Nielsen This was one of those years with 2 movies that were essentially the same. This is the better "Mars" movie...but it just isn't good. Brian DePalma sometimes, especially more recently, makes movies that are overproduced to the point of artificiality...and this is no different. It is pretty, but the broad scientist/astronaut characters and the screenplay seems desperate to check certain cinematic boxes. Things go wrong, self-sacrifice, we are not alone, everything we knew is wrong...it all feels so unnatural and it sucks a lot of life out of the film. But it is much better than the Red Planet garbage. C |
The Ninth Gate
Dir: Roman Polanski Stars: Johnny Depp, Lena Olin, Frank Langella Roman Polanski's odd demonic-book detective mystery is one of the biggest anomalies in the vast library of movies I have seen in my life. I can't recommend it and I know it is not a great movie. It isn't acted well, it is slow, not MUCH happens, and the ending is infuriatingly unsatisfying...but it literally ranks as one of the most rewatchable and enjoyable movies I have ever seen. I can't explain it. The European flavor, the unique musical score, and the subject matter of solving a puzzle surrounding books purportedly written alongside the devil...it is as if it hypnotizes me. I saw it in the movies. Loved it. Bought the DVD. Loved it. Bought the Bluray. I don't think my weird obsession with this film will EVER end. A- Bluray |
Nutty Professor II: The Klumps
Dir: Peter Segal Stars: Eddie Murphy, Janet Jackson Eddie Murphy is the king of multiple performances in cinema. But this isn't a movie...it is an exhibition of Murphy as no less than a half dozen different personalities. There isn't even any cleverness to try to put them in the same room properly. Cut to character 1, cut to character 2 responding, cut to character 3 chiming in, and so forth. And NONE of it is funny. This is 100% a waste of time and talent to almost insulting levels. D- |
OSCARS
Best Adapted Screenplay
Best Cinematography |
O Brother, Where Art Thou?
Dir: The Coen Brothers Stars: George Clooney, John Turturro, Tim Blake Nelson, John Goodman, Holly Hunter 1001 Movies You Must See Before You Die The idea of adapting The Odyssey, setting it in the 30s, and effectively making it a musical, is insane. But The Coen Brothers are too good of filmmakers to screw it up. This movie is beautiful, hysterical, and the music is incredibly catchy. Clooney is the star here, but Nelson and Turturro definitely are given their chances to shine. To watch these doofuses traverse the burnt, dustbowl countryside and encounter the Homeric archetypes all works. So strange but so satisfying. B+ DVD |
OSCARS
Best Cinematography
Best Sound Best Original Score |
The Patriot
Dir: Roland Emmerich Stars: Mel Gibson, Heath Ledger, Jason Isaacs, Chris Cooper This movie is WAY better than it has any business being. It is directed by disaster-porn director extraordinaire, Roland Emmerich, but somehow he formed an epic war/revenge film that can easily be mentioned in the same breath as Gladiator. It is grandiose, violent, beautifully constructed, and absolutely pulls at the heartstrings, even more so than Gladiator. If it weren't for the fact that there is some schmaltzy shoehorning of racism into the proceedings and that Isaac's villain is so extremely vile that he becomes cartoonish, this could easily have been in the running for the Best Picture oscar...that is how well-done it is. B+ DVD |
OSCARS
Best Sound
Best Visual Effects |
The Perfect Storm
Dir: Wolfgang Petersen Stars: George Clooney, Mark Wahlberg, John C. Reilly, Diane Lane I have the exact same problem with this movie as I did with Twister. Both movies are meticulously crafted with spectacular special effects and and exciting narrative. But the problem is that I can't feel fear or sympathy for people who KNOWINGLY put themselves in life-threatening situations, only to have their lives threatened. If Chief Brody jumped in the water to get a good look at the shark in Jaws, I would think it was stupid and not be worried as he swam away for his life. When Bill Paxton and Helen Hunt drive straight at a twister and then scream in terror as it moves in to kill them. Who cares. When a bunch of fisherman ignore every shred of evidence and warning that this storm will kill them, only to be at its mercy. Ugh. C DVD |
Red Planet
Dir: Antony Hoffman Stars: Val Kilmer, Carrie-Ann Moss, Tom Sizemore Look above for my opinion on the other Mars movie of 2000. This one is hot garbage. It is filmed with a red filter that makes it all almost unwatchable, the actors are atrocious, what qualifies as a plot is incomprehensible, and the main antagonist is a robotic dog that went batshit. I hate this movie where I was only disappointed with Mission to Mars. D- |
OSCARS
Best Actress
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Requiem For a Dream
Dir: Darren Aronofsky Stars: Ellen Burstyn, Jennifer Connolly, Marlon Wayans, Jared Leto 1001 Movies You Must See Before You Die IMDB #81 If there was ever a movie to scare someone out of EVER doing drugs, Requiem For a Dream is it. This movie is truly like watching a nightmare, as we follow different addicts spiral down toward oblivion because of their addictions. Ellen Burstyn is truly a marvel as the elderly lady who starts on diet pills and gets worse, and worse, and WORSE. I also enjoyed how Marlon Wayans wasn't a complete psychotic idiot like he usually is in comedies. Darren Aronofsky is one weird, but talented filmmaker. A- |
Road Trip
Dir: Todd Phillips Stars: Breckin Meyer, Amy Smart, Seann William Scott, Tom Green Tom Green narrates the story, so that is its first mistake, unless you are the rare-unicorn of a moviegoer who likes Tom Green. College guy accidentally sends a sex tape of himself and a hottie to his long distance girlfriend. Yep...it is that stupid. But...there are enough laughs here and there to barely get it a passing grade. None of it is because of Tom Green...but the four guys on the quest to get the tape back are fun and you are rooting for them. B- |
Rules of Engagement
Dir: William Friedkin Stars: Tommy Lee Jones, Samuel L. Jackson Lasting power and legacy goes a long way for me when I am grading a movie. The pedigree of this movie is solid, and the story where a Colonel charged with war atrocity hires a fellow Marine whose life he saved in Vietnam to defend him....sure...why not? But this is one of those dramas that is completely forgettable. For that to happen with these actors and that director...that means it really had to be missing something. C |
Scary Movie
Dir: Keenan Ivory Wayans Stars: Anna Faris, Marlon Wayans, Shawn Wayans, Regina Hall, Shannon Elizabeth There is absolutely no denying that this is a damn funny movie. The Wayans brothers are hysterical guys and the Scream/I Know What You Did Last Summer movies are perfect spoof material. It just doesn't rank in the upper echelon of these spoof movies...and I think it is because it is a bit too self-aware. The characters in Airplane and The Naked Gun have no idea they are in a comedy...and it is much funnier. This movie has a tone where it seems to be winking to the audience...and it is a bit odd. Still funny as hell though. B DVD |
Scream 3
Dir: Wes Anderson Stars: Neve Campbell, Courtney Cox, David Arquette You know why Scream worked? Wes Craven doesn't. It worked because it was a bit of a Meta-meditation on horror movie tropes, embraced them, and then turned them on their head. You can only really do that once. Scream 2 tried to embrace sequel tropes...but it didn't quite pull it off. This is just a waste of time. The gimmick is over, the scares are dumb, the spooks are old hat, and it is just another run-of-the-mill horror with nothing to offer. D |
OSCARS
Best Supporting Actor
Best Makeup |
Shadow of the Vampire
Dir: E. Elias Merhige Stars: John Malkovich, Willem Dafoe As a film historian, I love the premise of this film. Malkovich plays FW Murnau, the famous old-timey director who brought us the iconic Nosferatu. Dafoe brilliantly portrays Max Schreck, the star of the titular film. The conceit of this film is that Schreck was actually a creature of the night, hence why Murnau chose him for his film and had such a creepy personna, and in order to get the film made, Murnau had to feed the monster. That all being said...I wish it was pulled off a bit better. It is a bit boring and slow moving...and I know a lot of this film relies on atmosphere...but after the premise is set...there is not much else going on. B- |
The Skulls
Dir: Rob Cohen Stars: Joshua Jackson, Paul Walker When a movie is grounded in reality, "I don't buy it" is a poison opinion that can ruin a movie. This film is obviously inspired by the Skull & Crossbones Fraternity from Yale that both Presidents Bush were members. This movie tries to make us believe that this is all possible...but the level of manipulation, secrecy, and depravity that comes with this cinematic version is just silly, unbelievable, and uninteresting. D+ |
Small Time Crooks
Dir: Woody Allen Stars: Woody Allen, Tracey Ullman, Hugh Grant, Jon Lovitz, Michael Rappaport One of my favorite full-blown comedies from Woody Allen. This movie has the courage to go from a slapstick comedy about bumbling idiots out to rob a bank, to completely changing gears into something 100% different...and even more enjoyable. Tracey Ullman is head and shoulders one of the best Woody Allen ingenues in many years...showing that she can go one-on-one with his quick wit and insults. This skewering of the rich and powerful and how we shouldn't be so jealous of them is near perfect a comedy. Funny, sweet, and relatable. A- DVD |
Snatch
Dir: Guy Ritchie Stars: Brad Pitt, Benicio del Toro, Jason Statham, Vinnie Jones IMDB #103 The most Guy Ritchie-ess Guy Ritchie film. All sorts of sordid people are trying to get their hands on a priceless diamond...full of gritty direction and punchy dialogue. The diamond is irrelevant...because Guy Ritchie is all about style...and that is why I often don't dial in completely to his films. The style is fantastic...but there is nothing much else under the hood. B |
OSCARS
Best Sound Editing
|
Space Cowboys
Dir: Clint Eastwood Stars: Clint Eastwood, Tommy Lee Jones, Donald Sutherland, James Garner, James Cromwell, Marcia Gay Harden Complete absurdity, whereby a bunch of senior citizen astronauts are brought out of retirement because a Cold War era satellite, that no one else knows how to work with, is going to fall out of orbit with nuclear warheads aboard. But Eastwood owns it and actually pulls it off and creates a fun space adventure. You have the camaraderie of the four guys, the playfulness of the old versus the new guard, and the space stuff is believable and exciting. It all works out to perfectly fine. B- |
OSCARS
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Traffic
Dir: Steven Soderbergh Stars: Michael Douglas, Benicio del Toro, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Don Cheadle, Dennis Quaid. 1001 Movies You Must See Before You Die I never bought into this movie. Drugs are bad, drug dealers are dangerous and immoral, and drugs can affect everyone from every background. It is an obvious theme, well acted, and well filmed...but I always felt that this movie never got to any higher level to merit its near universal praise. The fact that Soderbergh won best director for this over Ridley Scott's Gladiator is a travesty. This movie is just an obvious grit-fest and nothing special. C |
OSCARS
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U-571
Dir: Jonathan Mostow Stars: Matthew McConaughey, Bill Paxton, Harvey Keitel, Jon Bon Jovi Could have been such a cornball thriller, with an unproven McConaughey at the lead, but this is a breathtaking, if simple, thriller. A bunch of Navy soldiers get into a situation where they must commandeer a rust-bucket U-Boat and try to use it to fight off their enemies...even though they are unfamiliar with its inner workings and everything on it is written in German. The supporting cast is a lot of fun and all the great submarine tropes are present...but they are tropes for a reason...they work. B DVD |
Unbreakable
Dir: M. Night Shyamalan Voices: Bruce Willis, Samuel L. Jackson, Robin Wright I realize that I may be an unfair detractor of this film, but coming off The Sixth Sense, which I was not nearly as enamored with as everyone else, I found this film pretentious, ridiculous, uninteresting, and BORING. This is essentially a superhero origin story, but without any intrigue or usefulness. Imagine if Peter Parker got bit by the spider, and we spent 2 hours in his bedroom as he changed, with occasional cutaways to the scientist that created the spider. That is what this movie felt like. I hated it. I may have to revisit it since now it seems to be part of a bigger, emerging story...But I am NOT looking forward to that revisit. D- |
What Lies Beneath
Dir: Robert Zemeckis Stars: Harrison Ford, Michelle Pfeiffer Almost an all-star ensemble of a Hitchcockian genre, most notably Rear Window and Psycho, directed by the masterful Robert Zemeckis...thrown together during the Cast Away Hiatus. This is a thrilling movie, with great performances, great twists, incredible technical expertise and flourishes, and nightmarish situations. When a movie like this makes its way into mainstream spoof...you know it is successful. This is just a movie that will keep you scares, guessing, and glued to the screen. B+ DVD |
What Women Want
Dir: Nancy Meyers Stars: Mel Gibson, Helen Hunt, Marisa Tomei, Alan Alda Say what you will about Mel Gibson and his lurid past with anti-semitism and misogyny...but he is an entertaining presence. He made a name for himself with Mad Max and Lethal Weapon, but he can carry a romantic comedy as well. The premise here is that an advertising exec electrocutes himself to the point where he can hear women's thoughts. Yeah...fish-in-a-barrell for comedy, but this is a surprisingly sweet film and is extremely re-watchable because of the charisma of Gibson and the chemistry between him and Hunt. B- DVD |
The Whole Nine Yards
Dir: Jonathan Lynn Stars: Bruce Willis, Matthew Perry, Amanda Peet, Michael Clarke Duncan This is the movie where Bruce Willis started to become a caricature of himself. Just like how I feel Meet the Parents was the downfall of DeNiro's career...I have not seen anything close to the former greatness of Willis since this ridiculous film. Here...he is playing a Bruce Willis-type emulating Bruce Willis...in a way that intimidates Matthew Perry. That's it. Most of the enjoyment of this entire film comes from Peet's enthusiasm. Willis can play this kind of character well...as he did sparingly in Alpha Dog, but it is just silly here. C+ |
OSCARS
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Wonder Boys
Dir: Curtis Hanson Stars: Michael Douglas, Tobey Maguire, Robert Downey Jr., Frances McDormand, Katie Holmes This is one of those movies that have to grasp you and pull you in or you will just feel like you are left behind, wondering what the big deal is. I am in the latter. There is just a bunch of random crap going on, none of which ever really interested me. Writer's Block, pregnancy, tracking down famous jackets, pot-smoking, inappropriate crushes. It's well done I guess...but I think it thinks it is more grandiose than it actually is. B |
X-Men
Dir: Bryan Singer Stars: Hugh Jackman, Patrick Stewart, Ian McKellan, Halle Berry, Famke Jansen, James Marsden, Rebecca Romijn, Anna Paquin The one that started it all and brought the X-Men Universe to modern cinema. The casting proves to be brilliant for the future of the franchise, and the action and mythos building is really good...but there is no denying that everything feels a bit amateur. The direction is not very confident and the performers don't seem to believe in themselves or their characters. It didn't all come together until X2, but there is still a lot of fun and a lot to admire here. B DVD |