2014 Movies
OSCARS Won/Nominated
IMDB Top 250
IMDB Top 250
13 Sins
Dir: Daniel Stamm Stars: Mark Webber It isn't a new concept...but it is rarely done as fun, as energetically, and as surprisingly as 13 Sins. Man gets a call on the phone offering money if he performs all 13 tasks he is given. This money will change his life. It begins with benign stuff, like kill a fly, then eat that fly, to comedic, and quickly to grotesque, horrifying, and life-altering. I was on the edge of my seat waiting to see what the next challenge will be. Most of the supporting characters we recognize, namely Ron Perlman, aren't used enough. But this film satisfies with the gore, the excitement, and the unpredictability that you crave from movies like this. B |
22 Jump Street
Dir: Phil Lord & Christopher Miller Stars: Jonah Hill, Channing Tatum, Ice Cube So the guys are off to college, and Lord & Miller are still bringing us big laughs. The films brilliance and shot-coming are the same thing. Its meta, self-awareness is very very funny...but it even though it embraces its repetitiveness...it is still repetitive. To the point that I am positive you will find it almost impossible to differentiate this from the first movie. Still...there is a lot of fun to be had. B- |
300: Rise of an Empire
Dir: Noam Murro Stars: Sullivan Stapleton, Eva Green, Lena Heady I am one of the biggest fans of the ultra-stylistic 300. That movie was like a bloody battle ballet. It was a huge hit so obviously it got a sequel, that Zack Snyder didn't direct and starring some guy I never heard of. Even so...it is pretty damn fun too. It is still homoerotic, stylized to the point of surreality, and breathtaking at parts. I was pleasantly surprised. B Bluray |
The Amazing Spider-Man 2
Dir: Marc Webb Stars: Andrew Garfield, Emma Stone, Jamie Foxx This rebooted Spider-Man franchise irritated me right off the bat. This sequel effectively killed it off. Jamie Foxx is such a terrible villain and the meandering, haphazard storytelling is infuriating. The Gwen Stacy/Peter Parker romance is very important in the history of this comic book...and Garfield and Stone were together during filming, but this film is so bad that they couldn't even pull that off. D+ |
OSCARS
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American Sniper
Dir: Clint Eastwood Stars: Bradley Cooper, Sienna Miller Not only is this movie a solid action thriller, with the tension and suspense that would be needed when depicting a sniper. But the weight said action would have on a soldier, deemed the most lethal sniper in US history, emotionally and physically, is what makes this movie great. Bradley Cooper has never been better as Navy Seal Chris Kyle. Doesn't veer of course too much and is straightforward...but you will be engrossed. B+ |
As Above, So Below
Dir: John Erick Dowdle The premise, of venturing into the catacombs of Paris, only to be forced to go deeper and deeper, and have the entire adventure turn into something worthy of Dante...is scary as hell. I was scared several times during this found-footage film because I have been in those catacombs...but it never adds up to anything. It's dark, shaky footage showing things in the frame that you can't quite make out. Also...I NEEDED the ending to do something like what I was expecting and it just fizzled out. It could have really walloped me at the end and it left me so disappointed. C |
Bad Words
Dir: Jason Bateman Stars: Jason Bateman, Kathryn Hahn, Alison Janney Black Comedy that is either not black enough or too black is really a problem. Jason Bateman's Bad Words is about a grown man who exploits a loophole in the rules of the National Spelling Bee and it out to destroy all the kids, doesn't QUITE pull off the perfect balance...but I did laugh a lot at the times I was supposed too. Too often, when Bateman is mean or unpleasant to the cute Indian kid, it feels just icky and wrong and sucks some life out of it. B |
KEVIN'S PICK
Best Documentary
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The Barkley Marathons
Dir: Annika Itkis & Timothy James Kane I love this documentary. An old timer based his course on a failed 1977 prison break, and it is so hard as if to be a parody or endurance races. It costs $1.60 to enter and one item of which Lazarus Lake thinks he needs more of (Plain White Shirt, Jeans, etc.). To find the hidden course, you must find hidden novels and tear out the proper page corresponding to your number and lap to prove you didn't take shortcuts. It's all such insanity and watching these obsessives bleed, cry, and pass out is great entertainment. B+ |
OSCARS
Best Original Song
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Begin Again
Dir: John Carney Voices: Keira Knightley, Mark Ruffalo, Catherine Keener, Hailee Steinfeld, James Corden, Adam Devine I have quickly become a MASSIVE John Carney fan. This man really has an obvious passion for music...and he has an uncanny ability to allow that passion ooze through his stories. Watching this film, with its wonderful cast and sweet, heartfelt moments, I knew I was going to enjoy it as much as Once and Sing Street. The songs are not QUITE as catchy as the other films, but they are still solid. I get chills watching Carney's films...and that really means they are something special. B+ |
OSCARS
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Birdman or
(The Unexpected Virtue of Ignorance) Dir: Alejandro Gonzales Inarritu Stars: Michael Keaton, Edward Norton, Emma Stone, Zach Galfianakis 1001 Movies You Must See Before You Die Essentially a meta-biopic of Michael Keaton, about an aging actor, famous for playing a superhero decades ago, trying his best to get creative respect by tackling something out of his comfort zone. This won the Best Picture Oscar, and that is a stretch, because what this movie is is great actors acting solidly with a miraculous directorial style. To watch Inarritu's camera seemingly move uncut through the story for 2 hours is something you have never seen before...and it fascinates. But beneath this technical marvel, is a simple story that never really engages the way the cinematography insists it should. B- |
Blended
Dir: Frank Coraci Stars: Adam Sandler, Drew Barrymore, Bella Thorne, Terry Crews Sandler's filmography certainly has its ups & downs, and most of those ups involve him and Barrymore. The Wedding Singer and 50 First Dates are def in the top 5 of his movies, and this is also pretty good...but only because the two of them have such great chemistry. It is a bit obvious though that the actors knew if they agreed to do another comedy together, they would be sent for an extended African vacation for filming. Still...there is some fun to be had. B- |
Blue Ruin
Dir: Jeremy Saulnier Stars: Macon Blair This is a hauntingly simple film that takes a VERY straightforward concept and portrays it so hypnotically and artistically...it is almost performance art. I don't think more than 2 or 3 sentences were uttered in the first 30 minutes of this film, yet I knew precisely what was happening. If someone were to read this film's synopsis, they would think it was a run of the mill revenge fantasy. It is so much more than that. The slow, relentless pace toward uncertain danger, the sudden, almost unbareable bursts of violence, it is all done so well. I loved this film. A- |
OSCARS
KEVIN'S PICK
Best Supporting Actress
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Boyhood
Dir: Richard Linklater Stars: Ethan Hawke, Patricia Arquette 1001 Movies You Must See Before You Die Filmed over the course of 12 years, with the same cast, as a gimmick to show the passage of time in ways that is impossible without recasting and/or cgi. The film runs 3hrs, and I was not looking forward to it, but it certainly held my interest for the entire time, which is a testament to the young actor, Ellar Coltrane, and the long-form vision of Linklater. Add on top of that, some of the best acting of Hawke or Arquette's career....but it still always feels like a gimmick in love with itself more than a cohesive movie. B |
OSCARS
Best Visual Effects
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Captain America: The Winter Soldier
Dir: Anthony & Joe Russo Stars: Chris Evans, Scarlett Johansson, Sebastian Shaw, Anthony Mackie, Samuel L. Jackson, Robert Redford. Captain America's sophomore solo-outing has the respectable honor of being the most adult movie out of the Marvel Cinematic Universe. There is humor to be had for sure, but Steve Rogers is a lost relic with feelings, allegiances, and conflicts that lend itself to more mature espionage thrillers. The action is top notch, the super-hero-dum isn't corny or silly at any point...even when the Falcon starts flying around. With Civil War and the eventual Infinity War, we may never see Captain America, or any Marvel hero, treated so respectfully again. B+ Bluray |
Cheap Thrills
Dir: E. L. Katz Stars: Pat Healy, Sara Paxton, Ethan Embry, David Koechner The premise of this movie is simple...two down-on-their-luck guys are embraced by a rich couple and are paid money to perform ever-escalating dares. $50 to the first person who does this shot to much more money for much more perverse and grotesque things. Its tense, its gross, its funny, and the twists in the film never detract from the central conceit...and I liked that. This is about what desperate people would do for money...and even when the stakes get higher and higher, the participation never feels unrealistic. The only bad part about this film is Sarah Paxton as the wife. She looks so bored in this movie and is given NOTHING to do...it was a glaring waste. The other 3 guys were superb though. This is great, sick fun. B+ |
Chef
Dir: Jon Favreau Stars: Jon Favreau, Sofia Vergara, John Leguizamo, Scarlett Johansson, Oliver Platt, Bobby Cannavale, Dustin Hoffman, Robert Downey Jr. Certainly a testament to how talented and diverse a filmmaker Jon Favreau has become. On top of Iron Man movies and The Jungle Book, he can come along and make a small movie about a master chef, who gets fired, and finds himself in a situation where his only recourse is to open up his own food truck. To watch Favreau's character get over his ego, embarrassment, and lack of technological savvy is heartfelt, funny, and as good as you can get for such a simple, sweet movie. It helps that Favreau is famous enough that he populates his film with thoroughly entertaining A-listers to make even the lowliest of characters interesting. B+ |
Coherence
Dir: James Ward Byrkit I love it when SMART people make sci-fi. This movie takes place entirely within a simple house and the street outside. Overhead, a comet is passing and apparently making all communications go haywire. What follows is a frightening, interesting, mind-bent-like-a-pretzel thriller involving alternate universes and trusting people are who they say they are. The movie has natural expository situations so we are never lost, the actors are all pretty unrecognizable which works in making them feel real, and the concept of randomizing things in order to identify the "original" house is just so much FUN for science nerds like me. I can watch this movie over and over...and I'm sure it will change each time but always be equally enjoyable. A |
Cuban Fury
Dir: James Griffiths Stars: Nick Frost, Rashida Jones, Chris O'Dowd, Ian McShane This movie is pretty stupid. It is about an overweight introvert who has a secret desire to relive his competitive Salsa dancing days. Guess what? He meets a girl that makes it worth pursuing. Yeah...dumb....BUT...these people are just so damn enjoyable to watch that you forgive the absurdity. Nick Frost actually pulls off the dancing...and that makes it even funnier. Its like watching Chris Farley in Beverly Hills Ninja...a guy built like that shouldn't movie that way. B- |
OSCARS
Best Visual Effects
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Dawn of the Planet of the Apes
Dir: Matt Reeves Stars: Andy Serkis, Jason Clarke, Gary Oldman, Kerri Russell My review is going to be simple. This movie has an ape riding horseback, screaming, holding a machine gun, jumping through a wall of fire. It's fucking amazing. If you can do that...you can pretty much pull off anything in your Planet of the Apes movie. A- |
Deliver Us From Evil
Dir: Scott Derrickson Stars: Eric Bana, Edgar Ramierez, Olivia Munn Scott Derrickson is a talented director and I am a fan of Eric Bana...but this supernatural thriller is all style and no substance. As Bana's cop and Ramierez's priest traipse through the city to track down possessions...you'll find yourself marveling at the visual style while wondering if you will ever remember and part of the film after it is done. Do dull, so forgettable, Movies like this have to get into your head and disturb you. I can hardly remember one scary scene. C |
Dirty Shield
Dir: Edgar Jimz Sometimes you know someone that had a bit part in a movie...so you watch their no-budget film and feel bad telling them how amateur it was. That was the case with this film...and it is ultra low-budged...but it wasn't the worst thing ever. The actors were fine, the story was common but interesting, but it had a nice little twist that really allowed the film a few more merit points. Dirty Shield isn't going to change the world...but it gives hope to the small filmmaker that you can keep it together enough to make something worthwhile. C- |
Dumb & Dumber To
Dir: The Farrelly Bros. Stars: Jim Carrey, Jeff Daniels, Kathleen Turner, Rob Riggle No one was really asking for this movie, and neither the Farrelly Bros. or Jim Carrey had done anything of note for years. That being said...the hijinks of Lloyd Christmas and Harry Dunn still has a bit of life in it. The movie pales in comparison to the original, but you will find yourself laughing in spite of yourself in several instances because we just love these characters so much. B- |
KEVIN'S PICK
Best Sound Editing
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Edge of Tomorrow
Dir: Doug Liman Stars: Tom Cruise, Emily Blunt, Bill Paxton It takes some extreme talent to make a gimmicky action/sci-fi epic to work as well as this does. The gimmick is the Groundhog Day premise of reliving the same day, over and over, and it puts it in the context of an extraterrestrial war in Europe. It is nothing but action/sci-fi gloriousness, and it hasn't been done this well in years. Tom Cruise is perfect as a public relations Major thrown into the thick of the offensive, but living the same day, over and over, means he is going to learn how to fight, how to survive, and how to beat the seemingly invincible alien race. This is one of my favorite films of the last few years...mostly because of how surprised I was by how great it is. B+ Bluray |
Godzilla
Dir: Gareth Edwards Stars: Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Bryan Cranston, Elizabeth Olsen If the only reason you go into a Godzilla movie is to see Godzilla, then you will undoubtedly be disappointed...because he is drastically sparse in this film, and when he IS around, a lot of stuff is "artistically" done of screen or behind closed doors. If you just enjoy a well crafted action/monster movie? It will do just fine. There are MUTOs, which are essentially giant insects for most of the film. There is also fun mystery with a nuclear power plant accident and the coverup. I found myself intrigued and invested in this film, even while I was confused by how little Godzilla was used. The climax IS badass though and you know why he is the "King of the Monsters" B |
OSCARS
Best Actress
KEVIN'S PICK
Best Actress
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Gone Girl
Dir: David Fincher Stars: Ben Affleck, Rosamund Pike, Tyler Perry, Neil Patrick Harris IMDB #179 I don't really know why I didn't love this film. I love David Fincher. I usually enjoy Affleck. Pike earns her Oscar nod. The story is layered and interesting. I think my issue with this film is that it is just so unpleasant to watch...which is strange. I can watch the most horrific of torture porn movies and find a carnal, blood-lusty enjoyment in them. Here...when the shit hits the fan...I just felt dirty and icky for sitting through it. Even though the movie is well crafted, I just found myself yearning for it to end. B- |
OSCARS
KEVIN'S PICK
Best Original Score
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The Grand Budapest Hotel
Dir: Wes Anderson Stars: Ralph Fiennes, Tilda Swinton, Jude Law, F. Murray Abraham, Edward Norton, Willem Dafoe, Adrien Brody, Saoirse Ronan 1001 Movies You Must See Before You Die IMDB #188 Wes Anderson is such a treasure, because he has his own genre in a way no other director has ever pulled off. He has a way of injecting near-pardoy into grandiose drama to come out with films filled with such whimsy that they almost defy description. This film, told in 3 different time periods, starring an army worth of thespians, is my favorite of his films, and it earns every single Oscar nod/win it received. Never has Ralph Fiennes been better or funnier, and watching him bound across this story is an utter joy. This is just fantastic stuff. A- Bluray |
OSCARS
Best Makeup & Hairstyling
Best Visual Effects KEVIN'S PICK
Best Makeup & Hairstyling
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Guardians of the Galaxy
Dir: James Gunn Stars: Chris Pratt, Zoe Saldana, Dave Bautista, Karen Gillan 1001 Movies You Must See Before You Die Marvel had a problem on their hands. It was hard enough to make mechanical billionaires, gamma-irradiated scientists, super soldiers, and norse space gods work as superb entertainment. Then they had to tackle alien assassins, talking raccoons, and monosyllabic trees. And they totally pull it off. This movie is as exhilarating, funny, exciting, and adventurous...and it is so absurd that its success is a breath of fresh air. It is almost impossible to explain this movie and how great it is...so just watch it. A- Bluray |
The Guest
Dir: Adam Wingard Stars: Dan Stevens This movie could have been great...but it kind of drops the ball and devolves into ridiculousness in the finale. Still...it is a very GOOD movie. Dan Stevens is charming as hell as a man who returns from war only to visit the family of his fallen fellow soldier. You can kind of tell where the story goes, but it is so exciting and so well acted (all around) that its predictability doesn't matter. Then there are government agents chasing people around for some unknown reason and innocents being stalked through a Halloween maze. I hated that the film ended on such a weak note. B |
A Haunted House 2
Dir: Michael Tiddes Stars: Marlon Wayans, Jamie Pressly, Cedric the Entertainer I actually liked A Haunted House, because the black humor take on Paranormal Activity totally worked. It's sequel is just out of ideas, and it is lampooning horror movies that no one really cares about. As smart as some of the comedy was in the first movie, is as dumb, low-hanging-fruit the comedy is in this sequel. D |
OSCARS
Best Sound Editing
KEVIN'S PICK
Best Production Design
Best Costume Design |
The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies
Dir: Peter Jackson Stars: Ian McKellan, Martin Freeman, Richard Armitage, Orlando Bloom, Evangeline Lilly, Lee Pace It is the end of an era. Peter Jackson has eefectively run out of the epic Middle Earth source material...and his second go around, as a trilogy, is simply less in every single way. Even as a final film. People may complain that Return of the King was too long with too many story threads and it had too many endings. Well...Battle of the Five Armies is the polar opposite of that. It is too short, too simple, and doesn't complete the trilogy with the sort of epic statement that was needed. Still...Jackson's Middle Earth is a place I will never tire of visiting...even if the 2001-2003 Trilogy is a much grander achievement. B Bluray |
Horrible Bosses 2
Dir: Sean Anders Stars: Jason Bateman, Jason Sudeikis, Charlie Day, Jennifer Aniston, Chris Pine, Christoph Waltz, Jamie Foxx Horrible Bosses was a pretty funny R-Rated comedy. It cashed in on the fantasy that people have who hate their boss. Kevin Spacey, Jennifer Aniston, and Colin Farrell wre superb as 3 different horror shows. The sequel involves our loveable, dumb trio getting swindled out of their own company...and then trying to get revenge. Its all fun, clever, and just enjoyable. Motherfucker Jones is still the funniest thing in both movies. B |
Housebound
Dir: Gerard Johnstone Stars: Morgana O'Reilly I LOVED this movie, and if the lead actress were not so annoying, grating, and unpleasant...the grade would have been higher. I do not want to ruin the surprises this movie has to offer at all so I will keep it vague. Young woman gets arrested for ATM robbery and sentenced to her childhood home for house arrest. Then things kick off with things that go bump in the night. However...you have NO idea where this movie is going to take you. I think I can count at least five 180s where the movie goes off into a new, unexpected direction, and it is one of the most fun roller coasters I have enjoyed in a long time. B+ |
The Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part 1
Dir: Francis Lawrence Stars: Jennifer Lawrence, Josh Hutcherson, Liam Hemsworth, Woody Harrelson, Donald Sutherland, Julianne Moore This film is precisely the problem of all these movies splitting their final chapter into 2 parts. They don't want to shoot their wad too early and leave nothing for the final film, so they produce a movie that is all set up, with no story arc and no payoff. This is Katniss as a political figure...used as propaganda to unite and incite the citizens of Panem. That's it. For such a fun franchise to have a 2hr installment that can easily be deleted is a serious issue. C |
I'll Follow You Down
Dir: Richie Mehta Stars: Haley Joel Osment, Gillian Anderson, Rufus Sewell, Victor Garber I kind of liked this film, because it concerns time-travel, but it is much more interested in the collateral damage that comes from a time-travelling scientist leaving his family behind. This is one of those low-budget ordeals but they got some decent actors in it. Gillian Anderson, Haley Joel Osment, Victor Garber, and Rufus Sewel...they all carry some gravitas to the relatively straightforward story. I was hoping for the movie to kick in to high gear at some point, or offer some mind-bendyness...but it never achieves that. I did like the penultimate scene and a shocking, unexpected occurence...but it never rose above mediocrity. C+ |
OSCARS
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The Imitation Game
Dir: Morten Tyldum Stars: Benedict Cumberbatch, Keira Knightley, Matthew Goode I can't deny that this film, about how Alan Turing cracked the Nazi Enigma code machine, effectively turning the tide of WWII, is done with a lot of talent, a lot of beauty, and a lot of passion. I just could never get much beyond the simple fact that knowing he is going to succeed, and waiting 2hrs for people to stand in front of this steampunk machine as it tries to crack the Nazi code, is way too simple to accomplish anything great. It needed a certain spark of je ne sais quoi and I never felt it. B |
OSCARS
KEVIN'S PICK
Best Cinematography
Best Visual Effects |
Interstellar
Dir: Christopher Nolan Stars: Matthew McConaughey, Anne Hathaway, Jeffrey Wright, Jessica Chastain IMDB #32 I really don't think Christopher Nolan can do wrong. If you try to REALLY explain his non-Batman movies, Memento, The Prestige, Inception, Interstellar, I bet you will fail. They all have their vagueness and confusion...and I defy anyone to really understand them at length...but I find them all fascinating, near perfect films. Nolan has a way of mesmerizing his audience to a point where anything they don't understand, they just accept. Interstellar is as breathtaking a sci-fi drama as we have had in years...and the climax is totally batshit crazy...but it doesn't matter. A- |
The Interview
Dir: Evan Goldberg & Seth Rogen Stars: James Franco, Seth Rogen, Randall Park There was a lot of seemingly dangerous hooplah surrounding the release of this film, where a gossip TV personality is invited to North Korea to interview Kim Jong-Un. North Korea was threatening violence for retaliation from its release. Well...that was dumb. This comedy is fine, with the standard stoner Franco/Rogen fare...but this movie has a fanfare unworthy of it. It seemed like this was going to be a political satire that will change the world. It's just a stupid comedy about two idiots. I liked it but it is certainly not important. B |
Into the Storm
Dir: Steven Quale Stars: Richard Armitage This is a weird one. I kind of hate Twister because the story and the dialogue is so horrible...but the special effects, even way back in 1996, were phenomenal. How could a movie made these days, with effectively the same premise of super-twisters wiping out towns, actually look worse. This film is a perfect example about how too much technology can be a hindrance. The power to create anything to look anyway takes the passion and effort out of the equation. The Twister people had to work REALLY hard to make their storms look so great. This thing just feels so sterile. C+ |
John Wick
Dir: Chad Stahelski Voices: Keanu Reeves What a disappointment this movie is. I have heard nothing but praise about this action film for years so I had high expectations. Somehow...Keanu Reeves did not feel up to the task. He isn't as impressive in this outing as Liam Neeson was in Taken. Reeves feels like he is showing his age and moving slower than expected...and it really made the action boring. I liked the idea of a sense of honor and brotherhood among hitmen and assassins, as shown in the Continental Hotel scenes...but the action did not entertain me nearly to the level I had hoped. C |
Journey to the West
Dir: Stephen Chow Stars: Zhang Wen, Qi Shu Stephen Chow makes Looney Tunes cartoons into live-action, farcical, martial-arts films. That is the easiest way to describe him. The tone, the comedy, the absurdity...all can be equated to Bugs Bunny and Wile E. Coyote...but you can't ever say the man does not have an astonishing imagination. This story has demon hunters, cartoonish demons, a ridiculously frustrating love story, and yet...the creativity that oozes from every frame is infectious...so infectious that I found myself accepting the film's shortcomings. Kung Fu Hustle it isn't...but its still goofy entertainment in that vain. B |
Knights of Badassdom
Dir: Joe Lynch Stars: Ryan Kwanten, Steve Zahn, Summer Glau, Peter Dinklage A movie about a bunch of LARPers accidentally summoning a real demon because one of their props is a viable demonic text has to really be a mess to not win me over. Throw in the cast I listed above...and it REALLY has to screw up for me to not be a fan. Well, I'm not. This movie feels like they made it by accident over a weekend. No one is having fun, no one is acting as their character would or should...and there are no where near enough laughs or scares for it to be at all worthwhile. C- |
OSCARS
Best Original Song
KEVIN'S PICK
Best Original Song
Best Animated Film |
The Lego Movie
Dir: Phil Lord & Christoper Miller Voices: Chris Pratt, Elizabeth Banks, Will Ferrell, Morgan Freeman Lord & Miller are geniuses. They took an idea that looked like a catastrophe and made it a perfect fable about creativity, destiny, and individuality...which is one of the most fun movies of the year. Legos are one of the most popular toys in history, and there are two ways to approach building with legos. One is to follow the instructions precisely to get exactly the perfect object as it looks on the box. The other is to let your imagination run wild and build whatever you can think up. It is a perfect analogy for life and lends itself perfectly to this animated treat. B+ |
Life After Beth
Dir: Jeff Baena Stars: Aubrey Plaza, Dane Dehaan, John C. Reilly, Molly Shannon, Anna Kendrick This is a silly little twist on the zombie genre. It is simply focusing on how quickly we would all notice the zombie apocalypse and how long some of us would be in denial. The film opens with the death of Beth, who was bitten by a snake while hiking. Her family is comforting her boyfriend, Zack...until they aren't. He tries to find out why they cut her off, only to see Beth, apparently alive, in their house. What follows is a comedy of errors where Beth doesn't know that she died, and her parents don't want to tell her, and Zack just doesn't want to get eaten. It a little too simple to be great but it has a bit of charm. C+ |
Life Itself
Dir: Steven James I religiously read Roger Ebert's reviews and articles while he was alive. This documentary that chronicles his career in movie criticism and his rough bout with throat cancer. it's major poignancy comes from the irony of a man with an international voice having his ability to speak taken from him. It is heartfelt and enjoyable...even though some of the cancer stuff can be upsetting and uncomfortable. B+ |
KEVIN'S PICK
Best Actor
Best Original Screenplay |
Locke
Dir: Steven Knight Stars: Tom Hardy This is the definition of minimalist filmmaking, seeing that the entire film takes place within a BMW with Tom Hardy talking on the phone over the car's bluetooth. It is utterly fascinating and Tom Hardy really shows us how wonderful an actor is. Watching him balance his work and personal life over the course of a very important 90 minute drive is never boring and you find yourself almost furious that the journey has to end. A- |
Lost Soul:
The Doomed Journey of Richard Stanley's Island of Dr. Moreau Dir: David Gregory Sometimes a documentary can have a great, interesting subject but just not be a good documentary. I loved learning about the trainwreck of a movie that was Island of Dr. Moreau, with the primadonna stuff with Val Kilmer and the utter insanity that is Marlon Brando. But this documentary isn't much more than listing those oddities and showing film clips. C |
Lucy
Dir: Luc Besson Stars: Scarlett Johansson, Morgan Freeman I'm going to spoil this movie right off the bat because its plot development is so incredulous that it ruins everything that came before, which is kind of impressive. Johannson is a woman who has a Chinese drug package put inside her, which breaks and turns her into a highly evolved, super-intellectual being. She evolves so quickly and so violently that she eventually becomes a thumb drive. I'm not even fucking kidding. Come on Besson...you are so much better than that. C- |
The Maze Runner
Dir: Wes Ball Stars: Dylan O'Brien, Will Poulter Concerning the WHAT of this movie...I'm on board. In a Dystopic society, a bunch of young men are sent to a strange glade surrounded by a supremely dangerous maze until the first girl is sent, and they are told it is the last. I enjoyed the action, the societal lord-of-the-flies-esque strife, and the sci-fi aspects. But when the WHY rears its ugly face...I just laid out a very long sigh and the enthusiasm was sucked right out of me. This could be a lot worse...but it could have been SO much better with purpose. C+ |
A Million Ways to Die in the West
Dir: Seth MacFarlane Stars: Seth MacFarlane, Liam Neeson, Charlize Theron, Giovanni Ribisi, Neil Patrick Harris. There is no denying that Seth MacFarlane is hilarious. It is also obvious that he is a huge fan of Blazing Saddles, because this movie is made in the spirit of that classic comedy, with the racial, sexual, violent humor that is absolutely non stop. I enjoyed this movie much more than the movie-going public and the box office did. Some jokes fall flat, sure, because there is nothing less funny than someone who knows they're funny...and that happens a lot...but there are enough jokes that stick the landing. B Bluray |
The Monuments Men
Dir: George Clooney Stars: George Clooney, Matt Damon, Bill Murray, John Goodman, Jean Dujardin, Bob Balaban, Hugh Bonneville, Cate Blanchett Look at that poster. Seriously. How can a WWII dramedy about a bunch of soldiers trying to preserve antiquity and art from being destroyed by the Nazis be this bland? I just think George Clooney is a bad director. He struck gold with Goodnight, and Good Luck but he has never duplicated that success. I think he is too big a personality and star that he is surrounded by sycophants. Its just not serious enough for good drama and not funny enough for historical comedy. C |
Muppets Most Wanted
Dir: James Bobin Stars: Ricky Gervais, Tina Fey, Ty Burrell It certainly isn't as fun and enthusiastic as The Muppets, but is has great guest stars, which is always imperative in a Muppet movie, and an acceptable story. The stuff with Constantine trying to be Kermit really made me laugh. But it is all ultimately forgettable and that is a shame from a lifetime lover of the Muppets. But...I'm sure they will be back. B- |
Neighbors
Dir: Nicholas Stoller Stars: Seth Rogen, Zac Efron, Rose Byrne, Dave Franco Nicholas Stoller is a great comedy director, but this is one of his weaker installments. I think it is the fish-in-a-barrell obviousness to the entire thing. Rogen and Byrne are married with a new baby and living next to a Frat house. That causes problems. That causes friction. And a war breaks out. Obvious. Extreme familiarity with where a movie is going takes some fun out of it....but it is still really funny. Zac Efron has never exhibited his comic chops better than in this film. B |
OSCARS
Best Original Screenplay
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Nightcrawler
Dir: Dan Gilroy Stars: Jake Gyllenhaal, Rene Russo Jake Gyllenhall does a superb job portraying what seems to be a psychopath, who finds out that he has a knack for filming news stories before the cops arrive and selling it to the local radio station. He sees this as his calling and he will do anything to be the first and to be the best. It is moody, exciting, and terrifying. and all that hinges on Gyllenhaal. Every word he speaks is electric and the use of his eyes and tone just portray a man about to explode. I loved every moment of it. A- |
Noah
Dir: Darren Aronofsky Stars: Russell Crowe, Jennifer Connolly, Emma Watson I really hated this movie. Sure...I have an aversion to Religion, but never to religious art. It can be beautiful, touching, frightening, and inspiring. This is just absurdity of the highest order where empathy is a near impossibility. It glosses over the horrible parts of the Noah fable, like his drunken incest tendencies and adds in stories-tall rock monsters that apparently have angelic souls in them...and it takes it all so seriously as if it actually were doctrine. Yeah...I just hated it. D |
Non-Stop
Dir: Jaume Collet-Serra Stars: Liam Neeson, Julianne Moore Liam Neeson is back at it being Liam Neeson. This time he is Liam Neeson on a plane. He is an Air Marshall who is told that if a $150 Million ransom is not paid, a person will die every 20 minutes. Sometimes these brainless thrillers are just what the doctor ordered. This is just fine. B |
Obvious Child
Dir: Gillian Robbespierre Stars: Jenny Slate Jenny Slate is very funny, very sweet, and the story of a young comic getting pregnant from a one-night-stand aftera a brutal breakup is handled freshly and interestingly. Unfortunately, when the character is a comic, and the penultimate scene involves her stand-up...that scene better be very funny, very poignant, or both. That scene failed miserably in this film and it really upset me becasue I was enjoying the movie otherwise. Its ok, and Slate is great...but smart and sweet devolved into awkward and off-putting at too critical a moment. B- |
Oculus
Dir: Mike Flanagan Stars: Karen Gillan A horror film that focuses on a singular thing for its entire runtime is a hard conceit to keep up. In this film, Karen Gillan and her brother have set up a supernatural experiment surrounding a seemingly homicidal mirror that traumatized them as children. It's actually pretty exciting at parts but it really is hard to accept the central premise of the film without much mythology surrounding the mirror. It is just evil mirror that we can't destroy or rid ourselves with. Its odd but there are some scares to be had. C+ |
Ouija
Dir: Stiles White A simply atrocious horror movie. We've all seen horror movies with people using a spirit board and all hell breaking loose. Well...here is a film devoted only to that....and it is phenomenally stupid and un-scary. Watch the sequel. It is actually light-years ahead of this nonsense. D- |
Plastic Galaxy:
The Story of Star Wars Toys Dir: Brian Stillman This documentary is completely half-baked. Nearly everyone knows something about the Kenner juggernaut of Star Wars figures, and there are a few good stories surrounding ideas and designs from the men who did it. But there was nothing about how Geroge Lucas came up with the monumental licensing agreement, nothing about the prequels or the newest film, and nothing that branches out beyond those original, simple figures. At 69 minutes, there should have been a lot more to this thing. D |
The Purge: Anarchy
Dir: James DeMonaco Stars: Frank Grillo This is the Purge movie that the original should of been. it embraces the idea and populates the screen with characters that act as characters would in a society as the one depicted. There is something frightening about not making it home in time before the Purge starts. And there is something also frightening about helping people like that when they can turn on you at any point and legally murder you. There have been 3 Purge movies...and this is the one that gets it right. B |
KEVIN'S PICK
Best Director
Best Foreign Film |
The Raid 2
Dir: Gareth Evans The Raid: Redemption was definitely something special...exhibiting martial arts and stunt work of the likes we have never seen before. The sequel ups that ante in such an extreme manner, that I had to pick it as my favorite movie of the year. This movie is so action-packed, so full of WOW moments, and taken to such epic heights and lunacy that you can hardly believe your eyes. That really is all I can say. It is 150 minutes of non-stop action that never feels boring, repetitive, or unoriginal. It is simply astonishing. A Bluray |
Ride Along
Dir: Tim Story Stars: Ice Cube, Kevin Hart Ice Cube is fun. Kevin Hart is fun. In this film, Ice Cube is playing Ice Cube and Kevin Hart is playing Kevin Hart. Ice Cube is a bad ass, veteran cop. Kevin Hart is his future brother-in-law that he thinks is worthless for his sister. SO he brings him along on a few jobs...and of course, you can guess, Hart shows his usefulness and gets thrown headfirst into situations he is not emotionally prepared to handle. It is all so obvious but it hinges on its stars...and they have great banter so it is pretty fun. B- |
Sex Tape
Dir: Jake Kasdan Stars: Jason Segel, Cameron Diaz This movie is extraordinarily terrible. How can someone's files be pushed onto brand new iPads these idiots gave to their friends? And they really want to break into all these people's houses and steal back the iPads? Come on. This is one of those lame ass comedies that can be solved with a few phone calls. Nothing is funny and nothing is believable. Only Jack Black's cameo toward the end gives this movie ANY life whatsoever. D- |
Sharknado 2: The Second One
Dir: Anthony C. Ferrante Stars: Ian Ziering, Tara Reid Since Sharknado was successful and trend-worthy...of course SyFy was going to turn it into a yearly franchise. It was inevitable. So there are more sharks in tornados and there are more soon-to-be-irrelevant cameos and terrible dialogue and terrible special effects. But...we saw that last year. It was called Sharknado. Did we really need another one? C |
Sin City: A Dame to Kill For
Dir: Robert Rodriguez Stars: Mickey Rourke, Bruce Willis, Josh Brolin, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Eva Green, Jessica Alba, Rosario Dawson I am a huge fan of the original Sin City. It was exciting, sexy, and had a stylistically beautiful palette that I had never seen before. I didn't see it again until its sequel...and even though it is beautiful again...but it isn't anything new. Dulcet tones poetically narrate how terribly harsh Sin City is and violence rears its ugly head. Is is completely more of the same...which isn't the worst thing in the world...but it is almost the same film. I liked Eva Green's addition and she brings some sexual gravitas to the proceedings...but she did it better in 300: Rise of an Empire. C |
Snowpiercer
Dir: Joon-Ho Bong Stars: Chris Evans, Jamie Bell, John Hurt, Tilda Swinton, Ed Harris This premise is great. The world is post-apocalyptic and frozen over. The only survivors have been loaded onto an advanced, high-speed train, that perpetually travels across the barren globe. The train is set up with a class system where the poorest are in the back and the richest are in the front. And then the poorest, who are starving and exploited, decide to rebel and make their way forward. It is interesting, absurd at times, and gloriously weird. Unfortunately, the endgame was never thought through and it totally doesn't stick the landing. B |
Someone Marry Barry
Dir: Rob Pearlstein Stars: Tyler Labine, Damn Wayans Jr., Lucy Punch, Hayes MacArthur, Thomas Middleditch If you are a fan of Tyler Labine, who is not in big movies but pops up all the time in small, independent comedies, then this movie is definitely for you. Three friends have grown up and moved on with their lives. The fourth friend is still a man-child who screws up almost every social situation he is a part of. The other three decide he needs a woman in his life...but their plan backfires when Barry falls for a woman even more crass and horrible than he is. It is hysterical at parts and oddly touching in others. Labine and Punch are so great riffing off each other. B |
St. Vincent
Dir: Theodore Melfi Stars: Bill Murray, Melissa McCarthy, Naomi Watts Another one of those dramadies where the cantankerous older man is rash and asshole-y on the outside but it is shown to have a heart of gold when he befriends the neighborhood kid. It's Murray playing Murray, but McCarthy is a pleasant surprise and shows how well she can act when she puts the brakes on a bit. C |
Tammy
Dir: Ben Falcone Stars: Melissa McCarthy, Susan Sarandon, Kathy Bates Ben Falcone is completely pussy-whipped. I say this because he obviously has no courage to tell his wife that she is ever unfunny or too over the top. The married pair is 3-for-3 with these garbage movies, that are so unfunny that they are irritating and angering. Here, McCarthy is a schmuck on the road with her schmuck Grandmother. Ugh...I hate McCarthy when she is this character, which is unfortunately 80% of the time. D |
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
Dir: Jonathan Liebsman Voices: Megan Fox, Will Arnett This is a movie where my credibility can be shot. My analytical, critical mind refuses to accept this movie as anything but silly nonsense. However, my childish, irrational brain actually enjoyed this thing. Realism is obviously out the door...so thats not a problem. The 4 turtles are well differentiated as they should be. And the effects and action are serviceable enough. It takes every ounce of effort for me to not trash this movie...but I just can't. B- |
That Awkward Moment
Dir: Tom Gormican Stars: Zac Efron, Michael B. Jordan, Miles Teller Just utterly awful, in almost every respect. The three stars are infinitely talented actors and comedians...but this bland garbage gives them NOTHING to do. They all date, and have relationship problems. It is as if the filmmakers took the Mean plotlines of every romatic comedy ever, and just let a computer spit out this average in a sort of semblance of a narrative. That is how lifeless this movie is. D- |
They Came Together
Dir: David Wain Stars: Paul Rudd, Amy Poehler To date, this is David Wain's comic masterpiece. He has several great comedies under his belt, Wet Hot American Summer, Role Models, The Ten, but this is a flat out spoof movie. It spoofs the Woody Allen-esque and Hanks/Ryan romantic comedies of the past...and it does so with near perfection. Wain has a way of over-exaggerating emotion and reaction is ridiculous ways, and it always makes me laugh, but I can see how it can be off-putting to some. This is just one of those spoof gems that lampoons the movies that inspired it, while embracing them at one level and becoming one of them...albeit a hilarious one. A- Bluray |
This is Where I Leave You
Dir: Shawn Levy Stars: Jason Bateman, Tina Fey, Corey Stoll, Adam Driver, Rose Byrne, Jane Fonda I feel like a broken record when I complain about familiarity...but if you are going to make a movie about a bunch of siblings, returning home due to the death of their father, and living under the same roof for the first time in years causes strife, then there has to be something unique to make it stand out. This movie does not stand out at all, which is a shame because it is chock full of talented people. You will enjoy the different dynamics that show up during the movie, but it will immediately be forgettable because of that familiarity. B- |
Transformers: Age of Extinction
Dir: Michael Bay Stars: Mark Wahlberg, Stanley Tucci Cut and paste the review of the last two Transformers films. When you throw $200 Million worth of professionalism at a movie about robots fighting each other, especially with the myhem artist, Michael Bay, you are inevitably going to find bits and pieces that are visually striking and exciting. So it can't be THAT awful if the loud noises and bright colors are keeping you engaged. C |
The Trip to Italy
Dir: Michael Winterbottom Stars: Steve Coogan, Rob Brydon Roger Ebert always asked himself the question, while watching a boring, well-cast movie, "would a movie about these actors having dinner together be more entertaining?" These Trip movies are putting that to the test, because these are travelogues where Coogan & Brydon talk about their lives and careers over some glorious food. I won't lie...it's not much for artistry...but it can be interesting. B- |
Tusk
Dir: Kevin Smith Stars: Justin Long, Michael Parks, Haley Joel Osment, Johnny Depp This movie is not good...by almost any metric...but I have to give it a few props because of its genesis. Kevin Smith and Scott Mosier got high during their podcast, talked about a Canadian classified ad about a man looking for a companion to spend time with him and dress as a walrus, and the stoners imagined it as a horror movie. Then Kevin Smith thought...what the hell? Why Not? He made this ridiculous nonsense. I still have to admire his passion. D+ |
Under the Skin
Dir: Jonathan Glazer Stars: Scarlett Johannson 1001 Movies You Must See Before You Die Often times, I use the term mesmerizing when describing great, unique films. Rarely has it been a more perfect adjective for this film. Scarlett Johansson is some sort of seductive life form, who takes men back to her apartment, which devolves into a blackness where said men are destroyed in graphic, horrible ways. It is slow, deliberate, wholly believable, and frightening in ways you probably have never felt before. This is a journey where we are dying to understand the thoughts and drives of this being, while she moves through the local population like an otherworldly shark. B+ |
V/H/S: Viral
Dir: Various Stars: Various Just as the previous V/H/S films, the overall throughline is unclear and pointless...even more so here. But the three stories are cool: Dante the Great: Magician has a man-eating, actually magic cloak. It is corny but fun Parallel Monsters: Man creates a portal in his basement to another world with an identical version of him. The differences on the other side are revealed to be a Lovecraftian nightmare. Bonestorm: A few skateboarders head to Mexico to fins d a skatepark. The wrong people and beasts reside in the spot they pick. Overall...more neat than scary. B- |
OSCARS
KEVIN'S PICK
Best Picture
Best Supporting Actor Best Adapted Screenplay Best Editing Best Sound Mixing |
Whiplash
Dir: Damien Chazelle Stars: Miles Teller, JK Simmons 1001 Movies You Must See Before You Die IMDB #46 Ignore the fact that JK Simmons gives the best performance of the year and Miles Teller gives a career best performance. Whiplash is a perfect example how the direction and technical perfection of a movie, no matter how small, can create a masterpiece. This is a movie about a drummer wanting to get his foot in the door of a well-respected music program...and it is the most exciting movie of the year. It is in no small part to its sound design and its editing...and it proves that you don't have to be a bombastic superhero or war movie to exhibit this kind of technical perfection. Beyond the technical mastery, there is such heart, passion, and tension on display here and it makes the entire experience wonderfully exhausting. A Bluray |
OSCARS
Best Visual Effects
|
X-Men: Days of Future Past
Dir: Bryan Singer Stars: Hugh Jackman, James McAvoy, Michael Fassbender, Patrick Stewart, Ian McKellan, Jennifer Lawrence, Peter Dinklage The X-Men Universe was being split in two, with the old guard of Jackman, Stewart, & McKellan and the new guard of McAvoy, Fassbender, & Lawrence. So a Time-Travel story where Wolverine is sent back to prevent something that will lead to the destruction of the mutant race is a masterstroke...but it is just not THAT great. Sure, it is fun to see all these people on the screen again...but I was never engaged in ways I have been in other X-Men films. My favorite parts were the future scenes where the classic X-Men, with a few awesome newbies, are fighting off invincible sentinels. It was scary, creative, and enjoyable. The 1970s stuff was just meh. Save for Evan Peters scene stealing Quicksilver. B Bluray |
The Zero Theorem
Dir: Terry Gilliam Stars: Christoph Waltz I don't know why I keep hoping Terry Gilliam will pull ANYTHING off. He is just a terrible, terrible director. The man has a creative imagination to populate the screen with weird crap...but his movies never seem to be more than just werid crap on screen. This movie involves a computer programmer trying to prove a theorem that will prove the universe ends in nothing....or whatever. It doesn't make a difference....look at how weird THIS character is. See how he's dressed? WEIRD!! I now officially hate Terry Gilliam's work as a general rule. C- |